Love Ya, Dubya

As an honourable citizen of the Republic of India, I hereby declare that George Bush is god. This is what my Prime Minister expects of me.

His diktat to the Communist Party of India: Do not have any protest rallies against the American President because it will embarrass the government and we have a tradition of hospitality.

Talking of which, have you seen the ads on television for the Tourism Board? They show some foreign tourists (all Caucasians; they won’t show us Blacks or Yellows) being harassed by taxi drivers/ tourist guides and nice squeaky clean Indians come to the rescue of these guests by saying that it is such people that give India a bad name. And then there is the voice-over that intones, “Atithi Devo Bhava”. (The guest is god.)

For three days, I will assume that the American President is god.

I will excuse the wars against innocent civilians as natural calamities orchestrated by god.

I will accept that people are tortured by American troops because it is their karma.

I will accept that the president has all the powers because god is omnipotent and omniscient.

But, then, god also knows where Osama is. Never mind.

Now, show me the money.

How will that help India?

The point is not to help India, but the Congress Party.

Everybody knows that the nuclear deal won’t be signed. India will say yes to several soft options and George Bush, after being welcomed with marigold garlands and vermillion, will be made to feel like gawd. But where the biggie is concerned, he will be given the boot.

This is not the Congress Party’s idea. It has been forced to rethink. It will now take all the credit and go around saying that we did not cop out, we did not give in.

Therefore, I think it is extremely unfair for the PM to stop protests. He cannot decide that such rallies must be held outside Delhi. How many scars are we going to hide?

Fine, take Mr. Bush to Hyderabad, show him the IT haven. I agree we should not sell ourselves as a nation of exotica. And, boy, am I glad that Laura Bush is not going to visit the Taj Mahal. We have had enough of those cheesy photographs of leaders taken seated on that one bench with the oversized crypt in the background.

In Hyderabad he will tell us what we already know. That we are on the move. We have technology, we have great talent, and we are great number-crunchers. He has said he will take that city to the globe. (Pearls did that a long time ago.)

How will that help India?

Besides, if he is a guest, would we want anything from him? Even empty promises?

The aspect that truly makes me uncomfortable is that the Indian government is sounding like a dictatorship. Who is the establishment to tell us how and when to raise our voices and against what? Is there no room for going against the tide in our society? This is the India we have lost. The India of Bhagat Singh, Subhas Chandra Bose, Ishwarchandra Vidyasagar, Raja Ram Mohan Roy, Rani of Jhansi. They all raised their voices, they protested.

Why are contrarians today considered cuckoo cases? The accusations against them go as follows:

Dissenters are not in touch with reality.

This is quite the contrary. Dr. Manmohan Singh has no grassroots base; he is the man from the World Bank. Forget about the villages, he seems to be out of touch with the co-operative initiative that came about due to private enterprise of the people. Does he imagine that all of India is going to celebrate by licking ice-creams because his finance minister has made them cheaper in this Budget? Is it necessary to toe the line of the moralistic middle-class when it is they who play the seduction game and have all heads of state salivating at their potential?

Dissenters are full of rhetoric.

Perhaps. As Arthur Clarke said, “I don’t pretend to have all the answers. But the questions are certainly worth thinking about.”

If those questions are not asked, then we will be a world of zombies. And what about the rhetoric spewed by respected leaders?

Dissenters cannot achieve anything.

There is this belief that if you have to succeed in making a difference you have to work from within the system. This is hogwash. The moment you become a part of any system, you are its slave. The achievement of the protest movements around the world is that they do not speak from a position of authority; the authority, if any, which is granted to them comes from below – it is not a fossilised legacy that falls on their head.

The voices that speak out may appear to be power-driven, but it is the power of the conscience. An anti-establishment voice does not seek approval or applause.

It is sad that we feel the need to speak the language of America. Why are we doing it? What powers do we have in the international arena? The Security Council? The United Nations?

You would be right in asking why we should be concerned about what the US does in Afghanistan, Iraq, Iran. Why should we be protesting against his politics?

By this logic, we ought not to protest against murders and criminals unless we are the victims.

When America had refused to grant a visa to Narendra Modi, many of us had supported this move. George Bush too is a criminal. If he were not the president of the most powerful nation in the world, he would have been put on trial.

I would like to see if socialites, who suddenly woke up to their inner voices when a certain criminal’s daily diet, clothes, reading habits were discussed at length in newspapers and on TV, will have a similar take on how the media will go berserk talking about Bush’s menu and his sweet little bon mots.

How will that help India?

Why are we doing this?

Recently NRI hotelier, Sant Chatwal celebrated the wedding of his son Vikram in Delhi and Rajasthan. The theme was ‘royal India’ and he talked about taking our country to the world. Everyday, there were snippets and pictures of the ceremonies; the guest list comprised of international celebrities, including the Clintons. Prime Minister Manmohan Singh too attended.

Why was a private function made into a national event? On what grounds does a man who left his country decide how he is going to promote India overseas? If the intentions were honourable, why ‘royal India’? Why the palaces?

The problem is we want to remain in this ‘maya-jaal’, a web of illusions.

We want to turn away from reality.

We are still suffering from a kind of Stockholm Syndrome vis-à-vis the White colonisers. There is a feeling of being indebted to them.

The culture we take pride in is precisely the one that they find ‘interesting’. What are we then catering to? Why are we singing along a song that does not resonate?

It is the NRIs, stupid.

Is it? If that is indeed the case, I would like to ask my government just how much are these blokes investing in their home country? How are they doing India proud? How many Indians take part in protest movements within the United Sates or even support them?

Are we keeling over before the US because of the huge outsourcing potential? This should make us sick. Young people despite faking American accents are abused in call centres; they are not considered ‘talent’ – they are cheap labour.

They have become the equivalent of the White Man’s burden.

Today’s front page of The Times of India carried a picture of the cone of a rocket being wheeled on a bicycle to its first launch site in Thumba, Kerala, in the year 1966. There is a small editorial note alongside. Its post-script is addressed to George Bush. It reads, “This isn’t a WMD. It’s a symbol of an upwardly mobile India”. This, after talking about the symbolism of how a technological marvel was being taken on the road in a bicycle and we have come a long way.

No, we haven’t. Because our largest-selling newspaper has to tell Bush that we are harmless; we just want to better our lives. This is snivelling.

I say, yes, Mr. President, this is a weapon of mass destruction. It came 40 years ago and launched itself into another planet (it is okay that the celebrated Henri Cartier Bresson, a foreigner, took the photograph), it gave us the arsenal to show our muscles. But it has destroyed the hopes of millions of Indians who don’t want a rocket to ride.

We are spending most of our money on defence. Not on education, literacy, health. What kind of upward mobility is this?

We have WMDs, Mr. Bush. Those will be the contrarians. They will hold up flags when you arrive, they will ask you questions that you will not be able to hear, they will be called names because they are fighting a cause that appears to have failed in the face of the onslaught of the likes of you.

This may seem like impotent rage, but it will simmer and if you get close it will burn.

How long can the cocoon protect?

So, despite what my prime minister would like, I say, Mr. President, go back home.