Music: A Compilation for the delusions, illusions & confusions of today’s youth

Artists: variousvarious

By Nadeem F. Paracha

1: Bajeray De Roti: Mussarat Nazir
Kyoon, kya hooa? Didn’t kick off with Tool, Metallica or EP? Or should I say, Tool thus Metallica and thus EP? Abay, dhakan … I mean “dude”, give this cracker a listen. Because how can you jump for pizza without first tasting the good ol’ roti. But, of course, Indus Music never tells you that. (Nando’s ki) murghi ke buss aikh taang: Pizza 'Rox, dude! '


2: Abhi Tho Main Jawan Hoon: Tahira Syed
I’m growing old, but even when I was younger, I thought this song to be the greatest piece of music (and lyrics) ever. And “dudes”, have you heard it, yet? I’m sure you have. It’s going to be the next Pepsi jingle and (thus) title of Noori’s next album. Sort of a sequel to Suno Kay Ham Hain Jawan. Cool, na? I mean, “Khool, yaaar.” Sigh. Like I said: (Nando’s ki) Murghi ke bas aikh taang: 'Rock rox, dude!'

3: InShahjee Utho: Imanat Ali Khan
Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. No, not Bayonce or Britany Spears, you idiot. This song. Ever heard it? Ever will? Ever can? No. No. No. Thank heavens for that. But what if I say it feels like tasting Mountain Dew? Obviously it doesn’t, but got to use the murgha’s and the murghi’s language. Kya samaj maian aya? Anda! (Quite naturally). Sunny side down.

4: Goorayain Noon Peraan Kero: Noorjehan
What a cracker. Great to play at anti-Globalization and anti-West rallies. But what if such a rally takes place in Mandi Bhaoddin or Mian Chunnu? Will you go? Will EP, Noori, Ahmed Jehanzeb, Ali Zafar, Karvan, etc, etc, etc … go there as well? Nando’s or Mcdonalds nahi hoga. But you can expect lots of Pepsi and Coke, though. And maybe even some Mountain Dew. And also expect some great Southern Punjabi chicks, dudes! But what about the murghies then? Well, you all can stand on that one taang and keep whining: “ Roti gai bhar main! Even Pizza Hut waiters are better looking men than these backward Mian Chunoos. ” Hmmm…is this why you guys secretly adored Mian Nawaz Sharif?

5: Pappu Yar: Junoon
Go spin a pizza, instead. Should taste the same.