Kleptomania

Well, the newspaper heading, "Mobile phone robbery on gun point on Rise"; don’t quite seem relevant till you have been a victim yourself. And suddenly all the horrific stories, told before or after your own experience, of other people getting mugged seem to make sense and you begin to empathize with them. Now, if you haven’t yet experienced that yet, chances are you might soon enough!

Yesterday, was my turn to be one of the fortunate to be chosen by a Mobile phone robber. Honestly speaking, I was taken aback; I mean by no means have I ever thought my self to be a “victim” sort. Don’t get me wrong, it’s just when you look at certain people, you kind of expect them to be threatening, and I think (or thought at least) that remains true in my case as well. However I was mistaken, which goes to show that never under estimate your gullibility. May be it was because I was in the car, and people behind the wheels don’t seem that threatening. Correction: People Behind the wheel of a stationary car don’t seem threatening.

Now I do find myself in people who should empathize with people who lose cell phones, only problem is my case was of an odd nature. Well at first, I can say I was asked cordially by a fellow to shake hands. But you know how many Con-Beggars (the people who tend to relate some heart melting story about a close one in hospital, or something of sort and then they ask for compensations) do that very thing, so naturally I was rude to him. I believe my exact words were “ Go away, can’t you see am reading”

Now after he had gone, obviously there is some stupid conscience, the same one which has made our beggars a part of higher middle class themselves, while they take from classes lower than them, in monetary sense!

But the same guy returned, and before I could utter anything, I found a gun lying on my lap (of course a hand was still attached to it). Even though the guy was clearly doing that to avoid attention, the first impression was he was jealous of certain things, which some of us have, and some of them hardly have. Don’t get me wrong, it was totally pointed towards that, I mean there.

I uttered a sigh of relief when the words “b***** Mobile nikal” (take out your mobile) were uttered, thrice or four times, to make it clear for me of course.

Now, I didn’t have a mobile, and I said that…..quite clearly…again twice or thrice (least I could do, I mean he has a gun and he could mistake one thing for another, plus he was also kind enough to repeat in his assertion)

Of course he wouldn’t believe a word, and insisted on having all my pocket checked, but only thing of considerable value were 7 Rs in change. While I did whole heartedly offered them, he wouldn’t even take them. Must have been disappointed and so he just went away. Forbidding me to get out, or do anything stupid. Which I hadn’t really planned, this guy was clearly afraid of getting caught, and I didn’t want to make him desperate, I could see what less than hopeless events had made out of him. And he did go away, to my relief.

All that time, which could not be more than two minutes but seemed more than that, I didn’t once remember consequences of being mugged seriously and which can result in anything melancholy. I did now, and I really thanked my lucky stars.

But sure enough, that wasn’t the last of the guy, he returned in 10-15 seconds, and so did my quite untimely humor. “Phir aagaye?” (came back?) came out of my mouth, before I could control it, he said without any reaction to my comment “Pichla pocket” (back pocket). I said, sure, I have a wallet there which he was eager to see.

But, again as luck would have it, that too was empty, except the ID and License, and three receipts of articles to be repossessed but over due by months. He obviously did see, there was no money from the top, but I insisted he checked all the pockets, the credit card, even visiting cards just to make sure. He however said “ keep it down, don’t attract attention, I don’t want to check your wallet, I believe you”

Now that guy was sure, and about to leave. I couldn’t resist saying “aap aik ghanglay ko loot rahay hain; meray pass kuch bhi nahin, kuch bhi nahin!” (you are stealing from a pauper; I have nothing, absolutly nothing!)

Something, that was quite evident to him now, and this time as went away he said something that was quite surprising to me. “Bhai, koi takleef tu nahin hui na, aap hameray bhai ho! Koi kaha suna tu maaf karma” (Brother, hope you didn’t have any problem, you are like my brother! please forgive all that was said)

Now I was speechless, what should I say, should I say “koi nahin, its after all your trade” or “try next time, may be you might get lucky”

However, I did say “sorry! Try somewhere else, may be you might get lucky”

And before we could hug, in emotional state that we were, it seemed plausible. But the guy got hold of himself, and quickly ran across to other road. That was the last I saw of him, I think!