Oppression of women in Pakistan: Myth or Fact

“Women are oppressed”, “Women are powerless”, “Women are denied their rights”; these or similar news make the newspaper headlines weekly in Pakistan. Even if they don’t make it to the headlines, they make ripples (if not waves) in the editorial columns, on the inside pages, or in the weekly magazine etc. There might be some truth in some of these stories but they are not the complete truth! And most of the time, they characterize the males as the oppressor.

Why hasn’t anybody done anything to correct this picture uptil now? To a society which has become apathetic due to so many factors: Musical chairs being played in the corridors of power, continuously falling living standards, high unemployment rates, deteriorating law and order situation; the news of women’s despair falls on deaf ears (because not only the women but everybody is in despair). People are tired of the system and, while this system remains in place, they are indifferent to what the newspapers write as long as they carry some delicious stories and juicy scandals to divert their attention from their daily agonies.

Only the editors of the newspapers, it appears, are interested in such news and heed the ones on child labor, nuclear proliferation or women’s rights. Then they write long and profound articles denouncing them. However nobody understands the recondite language of the articles except for the minority intelligentsia and hence no contra perspective is presented. And this silence of masses is assumed to be ratification of the news. This is why I have decided to write this article: to present before you the facts and analyze them from a different angle and let you decide what is the truth.

Many of you might have gathered me to be a male chauvinist considering women inferior to men or a fundamentalist denouncing unveiled women as Kafirs. This is not so. On the contrary, I am quite a liberal and believe that women are created equal to men and they should be allowed to dress as they may please (no matter how short the dress is or how much more it reveals than it hides) or whatever eccentric behavior they may put up; but I am digressing from the subject under discussion.

The reason I disagree with the news statements is most of these statements are made by women themselves and give the illusion that men are the oppressors. Hence there is a lack of impartiality and objectivity. Why is that the women who make most of such remarks are amongst the most influential in the country and they are doing nothing for the upliftment of women, barring a few. Nobody questions the authenticity of the news when they make it. However if someone (male) makes a statement contradicting them, his bona fides are questioned (like me being considered a chauvinist or fundamentalist in the previous paragraph). Yet despite this I took upon this daunting task to prove that women can not be oppressed by males, at least in our society.

One, scientifically women have a very advantageous position. According to Freud, a man has only two instincts. One to satisfy his physiological needs (eating, drinking, shelter) and the other to satisfy his sexual needs (it does not need any explanation like the previous need). Hence, she holds the key to a man’s satisfying life (both physiological and sexual). However, with the advent of Gay movement, this role of women has lost its previous strength but it is still pretty much strong. This strength is innate without even questioning her appearance (beauty and/or figure). If she has that also, it’s even better. What people won’t give to sleep with a beautiful woman? (See I am not a fundamentalist.)

Two, sociologically women are very strong in our society considering the roles they play. It can be proved through empirical evidence that women have considerable power and they enjoy great respect. They play such divine roles as Mother, Sister, Daughter and Wife (not to mention Fiancée that sometimes carry the most power). And their orders are not hollow words. Just see what happens when you don’t obey their orders. Most likely it would result in thrashing (by mother), a miserable life (by wife) etc.

Three, there are the women politicians which are the most puissant. For example, Fatima Jinnah, Benazir Bhutto, Begum Nasim Wali Khan, Kalsoom Nawaz and Asma Jehangir. Take Kalsoom Nawaz for instance who is using all the resources of her party (mind you one of the two major politically parties) to save her husband. Such is also the case with the other major party (PPP). There are also rumors of a coalition between the two, which is informally known as “Save the Husbands Coalition”. Frankly speaking, these two women hold the whole political machinery of the country hostage.

It is true that women are murdered in the name of honor killings but they are not the only ones being killed. What about the “Hari” slave labor among the feudal lords? They are also dying. But to our tainted eye, only the wronged woman appears. What about the man? Isn’t he suffering?

It’s also true that there are incidents where the daughter-in-law dies by explosion of the gas cylinder or kicked out of her husband’s house. If you visit such households, you will see that the mother-in-law is the most powerful personality in such families and all the injustices inflicted on the women in question is at the behest or incitement of the mother-in-law. True a woman is the aggrieved party here. But who is the offender? Mother-in-law: a woman no doubt.

Just saying that women have no rights, holding seminars and writing articles about it does not alleviate the sufferings of women. What we need to do is to educate the women about their rights, which nobody at this time is doing. How many women in urban homes know what are their rights? What these HRCP, PAWLA (Pakistan Women Lawyers Association) and NGOs do? They provide counseling and help to the abused women. What about the woman that has not suffered till now but is susceptible? Nothing, but after she has suffered, everybody will rush to her. Why nobody does anything to prevent it?

The question is not only “Who is suffering?” It should also be asked, “Who is responsible for this?” Not males only I hope. The society as a whole is responsible; and women and NGOs are also part of this society.