Pakistanis in Afghanistan, Nothing New

Feb 1, 2002



It was the famous British historian AJP Taylor, who theorized that the past had nothing to do with the present. History should be read for the same reasons one reads poetry or or watches a movie, for entertainment, as a celebration of life. His theories were scientific, just because something happened in the past had no correlation to the present or future events that might have been similar. There is no collected historical data or historical events randomly sampled that one can say happened in the past and had repeated itself.

Ironically when it comes to , one can only disagree with AJP Taylor and expound the unscientific, layman, drawing room interpretation of History, that History repeats itself, especially when people refuse to learn from it. One does not have to go far to prove this point. No need to soak oneself in hours of research, sifting through piles of dusty books and paper. That is one thing we can thank the department, not for imposing the drudgery of studies and Islamyiat on the minds of the young but for doing the research for us and making it available in a single book reference format. The studies book, not an ideal accompaniment for the coffee table, is one of the spookiest of books to be published by the of . It is spooky to the point that at night it can put unruly, naughty kids to bed.

The purpose of the text was simple, to enforce ’s ideology drummed with Islamic pathos. Due to lack of historical events, any kind of remote or obscure convoluted event with a tinge of has found its way into the text. Interestingly the events that expose the stupidity of the clergy have been highlighted with complimenting literary verve.

To mention a few:

- ( to ) Early part of the twentieth century large number of clergy from the Subcontinent gave a that is Dar_ul_harb because it is ruled by the British and Muslims should migrate to a Muslim countries. Thousands of Muslims took the advice as a word of . Sadly many of them were professionals, like Doctors, Professors and civil servants, who sold all their belongings and headed towards the Afghan Border. Many were not allowed to cross and had to return to nothing but to start afresh. The unfortunate who made it across did not live happily ever after. Many educated professionals were forced to do menial labor, while some who managed to get jobs faced a comical situation. Due to lack of positions in institutions and Universities, Medical doctors ended up getting nursing positions in hospitals, while individuals with degrees in Persian and Arabic ended up heading the English department in Kabul University. After finding only misery and no in Dar-ul-Aman, disheartened, the sensible ones came back to Dar-ul-Harb.

- The Khilafat Movement, spearheaded by the Jauhar Brothers and Mr . Hundreds of thousands, if not millions took to the streets for a drunk Turkish Khalif, languishing in his harem. Mr. did not join the Khilafat movement and criticized for dirtying the politics of the subcontinent with . Eventually the Turks led by Attaturk booted out the Khalifa and brought the movement to a humiliating end.

- Sayed Saheed Braili. A man completely illiterate but enthusiastic for . Fervently rallied the Muslims in the present day NWFP region to wage against the Sikhs. Many battles were fought, won and lost. Mr. Braili himself was martyred while fighting the Sikhs. Legend has it, his head was cut while fighting and his body fell into the river. End result, the natives of the region, predominately Sikhs and Muslims were so weak after endlessly waging of religious against each other that it paved the way for British to dominate the region.

To Shed some Light on recent events:

-Gulf : (Khilafat Movement revisited) Before the US bombing began, people took to the streets. Saddam festooned houses, cars, and living room conversations. Saddam was heralded as a Messiah, warrior, and leader of the Muslim world. His crimes against the Kurds and his own conveniently forgotten. After the humiliating defeat, Saddam was dropped like a hot potato.

-American-Afghan (Emigration to ). This time the crowds took to the streets but with doubly fervor crossed the border. Three Ghouls are worth mentioning for taking the lead in misleading and brewing the obscurantism Mahidi/Messiah flavor into the .

Dr Israar- It is hard to conjecture whether he is a worst medical doctor, a profession he never practiced or a worst Mullah. Although Dr Sahib himself did not feel the need to cross the border but was the most prolific in interpreting the Hadith of the Mahdi coming from the caves backed by black turbaned , vis-à-vis bin laden aided by the Taleban.Dr Israar a man of dubious character, extremely sectarian in philosophy, had his daughter married on the 10th of Muharram, igniting sectarian in .

Maulana Sami-ul-Haq Better known as Maulana sandwich. Only a few years ago, a Madam running a brothel in Islamabad after being apprehended by the police testified that not only was the Maulana a regular but preferred two escorts. Two are better than one. Maulana provided much of the muscle of the Taleban, provided training in his madressahs. In plenty of interviews he flaunted his photograph with Osama bin Laden, confirming his close association. After the Taleban defeat he made a retorting statement, supporting Talebans treatment of as correct and that Muslims do not want to make their Monica Lwensiky. The statement does expose the kind of mentality the Maulana has. forbid, if Pakistani were to become Monica Lewensikys no one could save them from the lechery of Maulana sandwich.

Maulana Fazul Rehaman Save the worst for last. The closest link to the Taleban. When the Taleban took over he was the first to announce his retirement from politics, in favor of Taleban style in and was the first to take oath on Mullah Omar’s hand and declaring him Amir-ul-Momenen, the first Pakhtun Khalifa. Son of Mufti Mahmood who doubted the religious ability and spiritual station of his son by mentioning in his will that his son will not lead his funeral prayers. Pre-Taleban history of the Maulana is quite amusing. Lost more than won, Pustho actress Musharat Shaheen being the Maulana’s biggest political opponent. Maulana is fond of driving stolen Land Cruisers and his brother is well known (feared) in Dera Ismail Khan to giving protection to wanted criminals. In Benazir’s previous tenure, gun battle between the police and wanted criminals living in Fazul Rehman’s residence was reported in the press to the embarrassment of the because the Maulana was an important luminary in one of the errant committees.

After the ouster of the Taleban, the Mullahs once again are exposed and there is plenty of talk that now is the best time to take them to task, but as one of ‘The News’ columnist Shafqat Mehmood wrote, “ they are down but not out”. In the end there will be more talk than action. A good place to strike is the educational system. Especially the Islamiat curriculum. Memorizing a few Ayats, a little bit of history and reading about the good practices of is not making us any better or enlightened Muslims. If the still does not have the audacity to abolish it as compulsory subjects, at least a little is in order. The present Islamiat texts should be abolished, the teachers either fired or provided with training to make a comeback as teachers of comparative . Islamiat classes should be converted to religious lab classes. In the labs students should be taught and tested on what to do when a child is born, how to bathe the dead and lead funeral prayers and other activities which help them become culturally aware and active Muslims. The renamed comparative religions Professor should be versed in the practices of all the major Muslim sects and religions that are practiced in . This way minority communities will not feel isolated and would teach the majority to be tolerant towards . Tolerance is the major ingredient missing in present day religious . There can be no unity till Muslims learn to respect each other for their diverse beliefs, there is no one kind of Muslim and no Muslim has a right to judge another Muslim, we are different but one in the eyes of the compassionate and merciful .

The effect of this would be twofold. It attacks the heart of the Molvi Industry . This decentralizes the extremely centralized structure of Molvism. More innovation is required in the field like handing over ceremonies to professional lawyers, instead of Mullahs, with the pretext that they memorize the required Ayats for . If a Muslim can perform all the culturally ritualistic acts himself or without the Mullah, like making a child Muslim, burying the dead, then the interaction between the Mullah and the ordinary citizen is minimized. The more the cuts back on the opportunities available to the Mullah to interact with the citizen, the more the is cutting back on the Mullahs sources of revenue, sources of mithai. The more long-term effect it will have on curbing the spread of this medieval plague by making the industry less lucrative and attractive.


The author is a Software Engineer and presently resides in the United States of America.