i met samina rizwan at this workshop in GHQ that i had to be at. i cant imagine i could be so callous and insensitive. i feel like kicking myself.
now, i am a big fan of this lady. her courage is remarkable. once i was in evacuee trust and decided to visit her....but she was in a looong meeting, and i couldnt wait. also, my husband is a huge fan of her late husband and practically idolizes him.

so there i was at the workshop, fighting waves of sleepiness, when this woman climbs onto the stage and lo n behold! i was shaken out of stupor not coz of vat she was saying, but HOW she was saying it. her confidence, her poise, her lucid clear way of speaking.... mesmerising!

after she was finished introducing the oracle team, the first speaker came onto stage as she was leaving and said "thank you, samina". WHOA!!!

samina?!!! could it be? how i felt like kicking myself for not listening when her name was announced. did i mention im a huge fan of hers?
so the next 2 hours were spent carefully rehearsing all that i would say to her right after the darned wkshp ended. why oh why was it sooooo long? i could barely sit still from the excitement!

finally, Allah Allah ker kay it ended. keeping my eye on her in the crowd, we (my colleages n I) went into the foyer and there she was! in person!
but first i had to confirm that it was who i thought it was. yes!! my guess was right!

i wanted to tell how courageous i thought she was. how marvalous a job i thought she was doing. condole her husband’s death. tell her all the good stuff my husband had told me about him. and then end by wishing her all the happiness in the world.
and now that i think of vat i actually bumbled through and said....it makes me cringe. how could i actually be so callous and insensitive? i casually threw her husband’s death in her face, "i read that article (my beautiful rizwan) u wrote after your husband’s death...and i have been a fan of yours since then" yes this is vat i actually said. maybe i should have stopped right there and rectified the damage....but i just froze and instead said "my husband is a big fan of ur late husband", asked about her kids, garbled a good bye and walked away cringing at myself.
i could kick myself.

but u have to hand it to the lady. her smile never faltered. nor did the initial warmth wid which she met me when i introduced myself.
and all i wanted to tell her was that i wished her well. :/