Lost: grey matter

I can’t remember where I left my brain.

No really. I’ve forgotten it somewhere and now I can’t bloody remember where it is. And now I’m all zombie-ized at work. It’s a phone day today – all the useless people of the world have united and have decided to call me for completely useless things. Mostly favors. At the rate I’m getting these ‘hey I need a favor’ calls one would think I have a shit load of contacts or something. I don’t. I’ve told them all the same thing: I’ll see what I can do. And I hang up, send a few emails, make a few calls, sip some latte and stare out the window while trying to think of a decent name for some managerial workshop. Eight days and counting, idiot friend and I haven’t been able to come up with a name. I can bet she’s forgotten her brain somewhere too. Maybe we should post a notice somewhere: Lost: My Brain. Seen something small and withering lying on a sidewalk near you? Never know. Maybe we’ll get lucky.

With the brain recovery.

Not talking about other ‘luck’. That is a touchy subject. We shall not touch the touchy subject today. It shall be left alone, untouched.

You know what I mean.

The Wall had me losing my mind the other day (that could be the point where I lost my brain actually..). I mean, I don’t get how anyone can get like him. He doesn’t react. To anything. There’s this persistent, consistent, almost-insolent questioning from his end about anything that he wishes to ask. I tried to get out of some evening plans but couldn’t think of an excuse. I tried the simple approach first by texting, “Count me out of the plan.” A “Why?” came whipping back. Tch. So I just say I can’t. Phone rings. And he wants to know why. I tell him I need to think..what’s the common excuse the female kind give… ‘headache? have to wash my hair?’ Something like that. Of course, since I’m not too big on those girlie excuses, I sounded like an idiot. He said so – just in case I didn’t realize it. And then I fold into my huge ass cupboard (seriously!) and speak to him from in there..staring at the clothes hanging above me and cushioned with the crushed jeans below me. No one said I was okay in the head. In fact, as I just told you, I’ve lost that thing that’s supposed to be in my head.

Anyway. After my (usual) refusal to meet up, excuses, screaming, pulling hair and his (usual) ‘why’ interrogation and refusal to accept my ‘70% of the truth’ reason for not agreeing to the plan - the conversation ended with “So you’re coming then.” and without any hesitation I say “Yeah. Need to figure out the time..” like nothing had happened. He picked me up a while later. Grinning.

Ass.

I need to learn how to kick up a real fuss.

Also, it doesn't help that I can’t seem to have a fight with The Wall. One would need the other person to bloody have the capacity to REACT for that. Clearly he doesn’t.

We then watched a bit of a movie that was supposed to be about a bank robbery but all there was in the first 30 minutes was sex. A little uncomfortable that. But I’ve lost my brain so I don’t care.

After leaving mid-movie, driving back, it was suggested that I get a new car. I’m open to that. I want a new car. I just don’t know what to get. “A 4x4?” he suggests. I’m wondering if he’s lost his brain too… “Me in a 4x4??” “Like that car called Jimny,” he adds chuckling wickedly. I look at him aghast, “JIMNY! You think I’d drive a car called JIMNY???” I mean come on…what were they thinking when they named it? Seriously.

I do need to get a new car. I really don’t know what to get. The Cooper S is still talking to me. It’s been over two years since it started talking to me and it still hasn’t stopped. But I’d have to sell everything I own and everything my parents own to get that goddamned talkative car. I mean, if I’m selling everything I might as well get the Ford GT now. I hate how it looks. But it flies. Not like you care but it beat the Porsche GT3 in a lap test. I also need 111,000 pounds sterling to get the Ford GT. Hah. I’ve lost my brains so I don’t care.

Have you noticed how Karachi suddenly has a bunch of Hummers? I saw three last night. That’s just nuts. I mean, we barely have road space and now these frikkin’ monster cars are all over the place. Then the Prados that are all over like flies. They’re everywhere. Or so it seems. Wtf.

I met an idiot client yesterday. He kept insisting that we make this ‘technical drawing’ of a logo. I kept saying, “Sure we can do that but I need to understand how that will help you use it correctly.” He said he’d use that technical drawing to check consistency each time the logo was printed anywhere. Use it how I asked – would he whip out a ruler? He thought about that. And kept thinking about that. Then said, “We just need the technical drawing to see if the logo is printed correctly.” Finally I lost my patience and suggested he use his eyes. I couldn’t help it. We’d been debating this useless issue for an hour by then – and he was just stuck on a technical drawing that, as everyone else in the conference room knew, wouldn’t solve the issue. But he had decided that he would be Idiot Man. So then I decided I’d just let him sit there and make a fool of himself. He was quite happy to do that.

But I don’t care because I’ve lost my brain.

Ooh. Interesting version of ‘Word Up’ by Willis I have just discovered…. *scurries off*

16/04/08; 12:44pm