Bushwhacked

I met a couple recently for the first time. They both live in Dubai and apparently are having a whale of a time there. Hubby works for Acer - the computer manufacturers - and the wife works for one of the fancy hotels that abound the desert emirate. After talking about their glorious life non stop, they thought it was polite to ask me about my life, in general and my work in particular.

Hubby: So what do you do?

Me: I am into publishing but I work in non-profit sector, I …..

Hubby: (interrupted me with a saucer eyed look which basically said, WHY?) But didn’t you go abroad for your degree or something?

Me: (not knowing what it has got anything to do with my work and his knee jerk reaction) ummm yes, I did.

Wife: So why did you choose to work for an NPO?

Me: I don’t know. I am a policy analyst by training so apart from government (Which repeatedly rejected my attempts at getting a job there – I was even told by a man in one of the government departments that I am overqualified and over enthusiastic about my work to make a go at it in the power corridors of Islamabad), I can work in a research institute or organizations that work for people.

Wife: So how much money do you make working for an NPO, do you make much?

Me: (visibly uncomfortable, because no one knows how much money I make, not even my dad, in fact even I don’t know how much I make because my income tax deductions vary every month depending on my fuel consumption) …. Ummm I make enough money to pay my way around.

Wife: But that’s not enough na, you want more from life, naheen?

Me: Do I? I guess if I had more money I would have traveled a bit more but I like what I do and I …

Hubby: (cutting me short) But wouldn’t a foreign degree equip you for a job in a multi-national?

Me: I don’t know, I never applied in a multi-national, probably because …

Hubby: (Interrupted me yet again) But why?

Me: I don’t know, I guess thats not who I am.

Hubby: That’s rubbish. You are qualified and you should be able to get a decent job in a multi national. What are your strengths?

Me: (with sugar coated sarcastic smile) I have a lot of patience; I tolerate bad behaviour and stupidity.

Wife: that’s not good enough, we will have to bluff.

Me: Bluff? Bluff who?

(They started talking about me as if i am deaf and mute and cant really understand what they are on about)

Wife: She is tall and presentable and has a really nice voice; I guess she can be good in PR.

Hubby: Yeah, or may be promotions (Honestly, I don't even know what they do in promotions).

Me: Excuse me, what are you talking about.

Hubby: Don’t ruin your life here, come to Dubai, we will set you up in decent job where you can make some money and live a comfortable life.

Me: But I do live a comfortable life and I don't like Dubai.

Hubby: Nonsense. Everyone likes Dubai.

Wife: (hand me her business card) Send me your resume and I will set you up with a few people I know. I am sure we can work something out in Dubai.

Me: Dubai? Who is going to Dubai?

Hubby & Wife: (in unison) YOU ARE (and left me feeling bushwhacked).

There is something wrong with me, no other living or breathing person meet characters from hell with this regularity. On another note, if this couple ever have any children, they would be so damaged that no shrink would be able to work his or her magic on them.