We all have to die some day

My old love is dead.

I have been gazing at her wistfully. All signs of life are gone.

I touch her cold body. It looks just like it always did – it is as strong as it was before. I run my fingers along those familiar, oh so familiar outlines. There is a hardness associated with it which feels new and it feels cold, very cold. I feel a shiver as I remember the days gone by. It is like it was before – except it is now unmoving and it will never move again!

Why do we get so attached to what we must never get attached to?

After all, sooner or later, this one had to die – like all our loves must die – like we will, too!

Yet, try as we would – we always fall for the inevitable. We are made of flesh, after all.

She, on the other hand, never reciprocated any of my feelings.

Don’t get me wrong – she did her part. Lord knows that she did her part well – but there never was any feeling. She never had any feelings for me or for what she meant to me - like I did for her, not even one percent.

She never had any feelings. Period!

And now, there is no hope. She is no more. Our relationship had ended. The years-long, on-again off-again, steamy, stormy relationship is no more! Like it was only a dream!

It did not have to be this way. She appeared to have a long life ahead of her – or so I thought. But she needed more care than I ever provided or could have thought of providing!

There is no other way to say it. I was inconsiderate.

I was a brute. I only thought of my own needs and my own pleasure and my own vanity. I never paused for a moment to think that she would have needs, too!

I only took from her. She needed certain things and I never gave her those things and now it has happened – and I can not revive her.

It has happened. And not only she has died – now she must undergo the desecration of her body – as I take every limb apart for putting her away forever, for making her quarters available to my new love!

Oh what a humiliation!

I cringe as I think of what she would have felt – being reduced to little pieces as the one who replaces her waits to take the place which was unquestionably, indisputably her own!

A new chapter is about to start in this ongoing saga.

My new love watches without comment as I go through this sad exercise. My new love understands, but she still needs every inch of the space that my old love forever thought as her very own!

My old love – she weighed only 200 pounds. The new love weighs closer to 300 pounds! Now, where did I put that Allen wrench?!