atif's recipe for food stuff ...

Recently I made a blunder whereby I confused paneer with butter and that made Aasif payee, our resident food connoisseur, VERY upset. This blunder not only exposed my lack of knowledge about food ingredients, it also offended sensibilities of many recipe sharing chowkies. Like any proud heterosexual man, I have always considered recipe sharing and the subsequent detailed food preparation to be an exclusive domain of bored housewives and raging homosexuals.

In any case, just to make amends with those housewives who have been shocked to see my lack of knowledge on food, here is my recipe (popular with unapologetic heterosexual men) for making a dish which I call "stuff":

- Open the refrigerator and look for any food stuff. If all you see is a hardened slice of pizza and an open can of corns, look into the freezer
- If you dont find anything in the freezer, scrap the built-up ice and you are sure to find some well-preserved chicken buried there
- Dig out the chicken, grab some salt and pepper, and throw the chicken in the oven at...ummm, make that 350 degrees
- Use the "sniff and sound test" periodically to check for any smell and baking sound
- If your fork can go through the chicken, by God its as done as done can be
- Put that pizza slice in oven. You can rub some water on the back of pizza just to make sure its bread tastes fresh when warmed
- Grab a bottle of ketchup for added flavor. If you are out of ketchup, fuk it
- Put that chicken and pizza on a plate, with the can of corn emptied on top

Stuff is ready. Serve it hot!

Preparation time: 15 minutes