My Dudley!

really hilarious, it would be great if you could get some stories published. just have a suspicion you`re not from lahore, as your english language style sounds sounds too karachiite?

Hay it was awesome, i like your all writing....well hope to be friend......hay i wonder how people write so good. well I live in New York, USA but basically from Pakistan... I think Pakistani people have great talent but the opportunities are so lesser than talent that mostly people die without expressing what they are holding inside..

love to be friend my e-mail: alfonsejaved@yahoo.com

As Zoë Heller said ...``All she needs is a good boning``...

i agree to the fact that is diffcult for umarried girl in pakistan at age of 23 ,it is great at least got a chance to meet the dudley befor marriage how is it now

Only bad in it is the `` Accountant``
Me an accoumtant

Just wanted to throw my belief out here and would be interested to see what anyone has to say.

Marriages are more successful in south asia (upto 75%). These marriages are majorly arranged. Now --are these marriages successful because people culturally tend to adopt and just accept the `arranged` life or is it because violence/frustration/need-to-divorce are less reported and acted upon?

This may be a whole another issue but it came to my mind as AsmaM`s article initially gave a picture of a future divorce with the ``raza guy``

really nice one to read... smile kept visting my face during while reading the story...

Kudos to Asmaa

i really really enjoyed this...well done!

hi asma,

i couldnt stop myself not to read, its lovly, veryyyyyyyy interesting, i enjoy it a lot. u have a natural flair to write your personal experience.
One thing more, i seconds Atif2`s argument tht this type of fiction should be placed at the first page of Chowk.

take care
Maqsood Behari

wow i totally enjoyed it!

It is a very interesting piece of writing.The style is simply superb!

You certainly have a way with words. And, with that quality, no one can be lonely. Being alone is an enjoyable experience. and it never kills, for sure.

Re: # 32
Pretty nice effort....very original...
well its the way things work in punjab...isnt it?
keep it up

Nice article..... I wonder if ``bloody Raza guy`` has read this

great work for a 17 year old though....

I never knew being fair was a sin.... being a bit tanned isn`t that bad after all

I loved reading it!
But it sounded too real to have been 100% fiction.

well written. keep it up Asmaa

Lol...well, umm, no offence, but most accountants are pretty boring (speaking from personal experience) :))
asmaa
p.s everyone, thanks for the comments!

goor one:) just a small ques!! why r all accountants being stereotyped to be nerds..lolzz

Somehow I missed seeing this article until another chowkie told me about it.

It is an amazingly well written story. It probably was just an everyday incident of two families meeting for rishta in Lahore. But it was the style of writing (the ``hah`` followed by the ``oh`` when Raza is explaining inflation) that made it such a lovely read.

My biggest complain about chowk front page is that it is full of bullcrap where people write hate-filled articles, followed by pseudo-intellectual discussions. What is needed on chowk are ``My Dudley`` kind of original writings which resonate with an average person, and not just with the resident intellectuals of chowk.

great job !

wow.. amazing......

really impressive .. nice work girl, hoping for atleast a dozen more ;)

Nice piece. Interesting writing style.
And ah... well, I have a version ready, from the perspctive of Mr. Raza. But the problem is that I dont know how to post a piece on chowk. The articles I sent in earlier, havent yet been published.

An excellent article. Though a bit dragged in the middle, but still, I would highly rank it. It would be interesting to have an article from Mr Raza`s perspective as well :]!!

Dear Asmaa

Absolutely hilarious - great stuff

A nice piece..........impressive debut asmaa.I liked the style and the pace..

Keep writing

Regards
Nandan

refreshing piece! chowk needs more such of these

This was funny. I especially liked the dream sequences. :)
This story can be very easily adapted into a one act play, or may be short film. Good writing.

Aasma,

I don`t see the adjective ``frothy`` as particularly negative.

Good luck with your writing,

-S

elusive, the girl in the story is supposed to be a 23 year old and i cant say if 23 year olds think like that. Dunno about them, but 17 year olds certainly do!:)
scout, aashee, and avkrishna, thanks!
Bina, youve set me thinking about a part 2 .after my exams inshAllah. (thanks a lot for the comment. means a lot coming from such an accomplished writer)
samb, am glad you liked the references.( love the word pakistaniyat!)
saminasha, i know my writing is not in any way amazing, and can seem frivolous at times, thanks for your opinion. Im hoping it gets better with time.
asmaa

enjoyable, funny and a very good read. well written Asmaa. :-)

especially liked how you worked in Pakistani pop culture references - increased the Pakistaniyat of the story. you don`t see that often and particularly not done as well as this.

Hey asmaa, i thought it was pretty good as a first attempt, i liked it.. didn`t expect it froom u.. although u did go a bit overboard with the whole ``gotta prove him dumb`` attitude but it was still hilarious and worth a read...(oh yeah btw the whole kissing on the cheeks thing, we women gotta stop it, its too irritating)...

LOL!...that was hilarious. Reminded me of my time when i met my future husband...:)

frothy.

Killmen

you are welcome to do so..

write to ``editor@naseeb.com`` and put ``ref: Yasser Hamdani``

Great fun! Looks like Pakistan has its answer to Bridget Jones.

I want Part 2.

asma,

i didn`t like this story but i like your laid back style of writing, plus you have a good attitude about yourself and criticism, which is impressive in itself.

good luck

Great beginning Asma,
Keep going,

- Avkrishna

Oh God. if this is the way an average Pakistani woman thinks...

SOS please!

How old is the girl in the story?She seems to be a teenager.

---

I laughed all the way through.it was quite pleasurable reading this story.Although, the style of writing needs more professionalism, but that will come with time.


Keep writing.

---

Scout, thanks for your opinion, and am sorry you didnt like it.
Yin yang, thanx!
and mantolives, i am taking your offer very seriously, and am planning to flood your inbox with a barrage of articles :)

asmaa, enjoyed this a lot. this is what many girls go thru & you made it sound just so humorous & lively. liked the conversational style, only at one or two points it was like you are feeling superior. all in all good work. this is what young women talk about anyways

kill-men,

it`s not your fault, the fault lies within the person who published this article, and thus underestimated the intelligence of female chowk interactors who may come to the `woman`s room` with a ton of hope tucked under their bras.

i came to the `woman`s room` with a lot of hope..... but all i feel like doing right now is pounding my head against a wall

Well keep writing... hopefuly we will finally have a truly hilarious, frank and comic Pakistani English novel yet... I write/sub-edit for Daily Times and my wife is the editor of Naseeb Vibes.. if you are ever interested in contributing something - do send it over.

Thankyou so much! you have no idea what that means to me! And, no, amna is not a sister, although i got the idea of writing this aritcle when a family friend`s daughter got married, and their meetup point was also at Mcdonalds. So, it`s not entirely a work of fiction.:) Thanks again!
asmaa

Dear Asma,

Your attempt is not amateur at all... pretty good.

Is it completely fictitious or is Amna your sister?