Muslims in Infidelistan: A Ready Reckoner

#25, MannyD {`Then there are suicidal seagulls flying into the propeller blades, like Zahraj and Saminasha, who are hilarious as heck.``}

Manny,
LOL. You are so funny - I never realized that we were already airborne.

#28, Delhiwalla {`This was very hilarious-minus the Sikh part. ..
In fact most of the Airports where I have been to already know how to differentiate between Sikhs and Muslims....
Last Friday I went to a famous Indian restaurant in MA that has the word ``India`` in it. owner of thi place is a Muslim and the bastard hates India and Sikhs like anything, it got apparent after listening to his views. But yet he would have Ganesh`s idol next to the cash register and display Yoga Posters outside and retain the name India in his restaurant`s name. Why????? Should`nt there be some kind of criterion?
.``}

Dillidost,
Thank you for laughing - minus the Sikh part. I am receiving similarly conditional affirmations of joy - some say minus the jihadi part, some say minus the Hindu part, and some are upset at the vivid description of the wazoo in the restroom. Different strokes for different folks.

The owner of the restaurant is simply following my advice #10 - start acting like an Indian. BTW, how do the Airport guys you know differentiate between Sikhs and Muslims? Do they use sonar, radar, x-rays, or just plain old sniffin?

Re: # 65
Salim, I am surprised that you ask that question when you said that you have many friends in immigration.

Anyways, Sikhs wear a Turban in a very disctinct way and almost never wear DESI dress when travelling. They wear suit or shirt-trousers etc never a loose gown.
Whereas Muslims never wear a Turban, and if by any rare chance that they wear, they are Mullah type certainly do not wear Pants-Shirt. Also, most of the immigration staff has been made aware of differences between different people by organizations such as SMART to educate them about Sikhs.

Have you met any Sikh who has complained about racial profiling at Airports in West? Please let me know and I would like to investigate that matter.

This does not discount the fact that Police and State Troopers are all good. They can be nasty and there are cases when they discrimated against Sikhs in Oregon/MA/NC/CA.

Re: # 60

Chuhan,

``not stolen some ideas``? there is not one line in this ``article`` that it is original...the concept itself is as hackneyed as a bollywood movie from soul patch/pubic hair, soul patch/penis similies to refried multiculti references....and the proof? the cheerful bleats of support posted in your favor the minute someone points out how utterly tasteless and devoid of real anything this latest jerk off of yours is....people are happy you can hold a thought for more than a minute...but an extended retch of cliches?

Well for chowk.com, thats a veritable opus...

#29, diarox {`instead of trying to present a good image infront of those who do not understand Islam, are you suggesting people should give up their faith? islam is not something to be ashamed of or something to be practiced only in private...the whole point of the faith is lost if a person cannot be proud of it, might as well convert to something else then. in my opinion your guidelines are a total disgrace.
.``}

Dear Diarox,
I never implied that you should give up your faith or not be proud to be Muslim. On the contrary, I suggest that you give up the external, meaningless, and ritualistic nonsense that identifies you with the extremists, puts you at odds with the natives, and presents your faith in a very negative, hostile, and self-centered way. Messing up restrooms just for wazoo, wearing hijab, burkas, and chaddors just to attract more attention, and making disgusting faces at a ham sandwich or a beer are not ways to gain acceptance in foreign lands. Why not display the more attractive aspects of Islam - equality, brotherhood, tolerance, love, compassion, peace, simplicity, charity, and many others? Why is it always anger, shouting, missing teeth, too much hair on the face, raised fists, burning flags, slaughtered animals, slaughtered humans, entombed women, lack of concern for any life, blown up statues, blown up temples, blown up mosques....?

#30, antamazol {`concern is why should we hide our religion?
i think we should be confident , doing and carrying nothing wrong with us is suffice.
i have never been investigated on any airport.``}

Dear anta,

Please see my response to Diarox in the prvious message. I am so glad that you were never investiaged at any airport. Now, please return the pilot`s uniform to the person you stole it from. He is mad as hell and wants it back. :)

jazbati74 #40, ... that there are so many in this goras world like u, so many who r happy to excoriate their own, and those who revel in their own idoticy.
tum jo kar low, raho gay tau mr choo..., lighter skin or a darker posterior....
.....munnay tu maara gaya!..sooner or later, and try to consume a lil less in the happy hour! ``}

Jazbati, Yaar where did you get 74? Why are you bragging about the extra two? Don`t tell me it was due to the brownie points you earned being a nuisance on Chowk?

Obviously, you didn`t get the satire the was at the expense of goras - English, American, French, Greeks, and others. Does picking on a Rajput name like Chauhan make you feel superior? Are you a Sayyed?

lathamaha #43, {``I couldnt believe my eyes, an article that makes me ``laugh`` .... when I read the word infidelistan, i was wondering what i would encounter. The one about the tips and free drinks was simply great. The laptop bag was another one which kept me in splits !!!!
The tongue in cheek style, the para by para analysis of each country, laughing at ourselves, whether hindus or muslims - well, bravo !!! Three cheers Chauhan ! Welcome to chowk. ``}

LM,
Thank you for such an encouraging freedback. It just makes my day when I learn that I have made someone laugh - even a little. There is just too much sadness, anger, and hatred in this world - let`s laugh at ourselves, each other, and try to love while laughing.
Thanks, again.

and the pleading and explaining continues....

#52, Delhiwalla {``SalimDost,
Please take your negative comments about Sikhs back as I have never been mistreated by ... in fact once in a while I get people who ask me about Yoga and India.

Why have`nt Muslims picked up on fact that before 9-11 or pre 96 era, there was hardly any discrimination at Airports(looks dont count as discrimination)????``}

Dillidost,
I take my comments back, just so that you don`t feel that I am anti-Sikh. Some of my best friends, especially on Chowk, are Sikh. Next time, Dillidost, please take off your turban and stop charming the snake in the basket. The snake can`t hear and your shanai is attracting too much attention. Also, try not to wrap your legs around your neck at the immigration counter, and people will stop pestering you about Yoga. Just kidding, yaar. How are YOU?

Your last question about Muslims is very rational. Some Muslims create unnecessary havoc, violence, and bloodshed in the name of Islam, and everyone else has to pay for their senseless stupidity -especially other Muslims.

#67, Saminasha {``Chuhan,
``not stolen some ideas``? there is not one line in this ``article`` that it is original...the concept itself is as hackneyed as a bollywood movie from soul patch/pubic hair, soul patch/penis similies to refried multiculti references....and the proof? the cheerful bleats of support posted in your favor the minute someone points out how utterly tasteless and devoid of real anything this latest jerk off of yours is....people are happy you can hold a thought for more than a minute...but an extended retch of cliches? ``}

Dear Lady (using the term very loosely),
Please stop this profanity-laden barrage of your venom-afflicted perception. This is the upper house of Chowk and stupidity does not excuse this lewd and crude behavior from you. I have not plagiarized a single phrase, joke, or topic. All the material is my own, but then telling that to someone of your cut & paste persuasion is useless. I just request that you stop your extreme jealousy from confirming your status as an aggrieved and uncivilized person. Also, please note that my last name is Chauhan and not as you deliberately made it to sound like a rodent. Please also note that your own name is quite akin to a bank - and not of a financial institution type either.

Chuhan,

Line by line we could break this ``article`` down and count the number of previous outside texts came up with those ideas first.


Chuhan writes:

``Let’s face it, when you show up at the airport with your six inch beard, making your face look like a European beaver...``

In this week`s Sunday Styles section, the Modern Love columnist writes:


``Because, I`ll admit it, I`m a sucker for a pretty face, and the Tiny House Man`s face was very pretty, delicately featured yet masculine. Unfortunately it was bearded in the soul patch style, which can make any chin look vaguely pudendal, but that was nothing that a persuasive girlfriend and a lovingly applied coat of Nair couldn`t eventually take care of.``

From: ``A Girl Could Get Cornered in a Tiny House``; NYTimes

Shall we continue?

chuhan wants to critique the west, but can`t come with the ideas to do so....

aawww...look how insecure chuhan is...he`s just posted the EDITED version of our next to last exchange on his ``ilaaaaaag!``...what are the bets that he`ll post my last two interacts on it next?

what, no takers?


you must all know his m.o......

Re: # 74
SalimDost,
Thanks for clarifying in your previous post about my RFI that was posted in two previous posts by myself.
I think that you are the most hilarious person after the actor Mahmood, who used to entertain others by his wise, funny comments. Also, the fact that you are a Chauhan makes you almost a Sikh Biradari, as many of my good friends and some relatives are Chauhans from Amritsar.

Furthermore, you know how to put kitty in the bag when she tries to scream.

I would have posted ikons here but do not know how to do so on FP.
:o

omigod...pity posts.....