Don’t Shoot the Messenger

Hilarious! You have the God-gifted talent to take the most mundane of things and give them a funny twist. (Keep those hands away from your hubby’s neck!!!)

[That’s the problem with the New Man. He never wants to beat people up anymore.]
Those who have been beaten into pulp themselves are unlikely to become aggressive!

nice one.

[....a well-dressed man with two children strode determinedly forward and plunked his bags and two children adjacent to the person at the top of the line, forming another one.]

I went to a local hospital recently and was paying for a series of laboratory tests. I was trying to count out the money from my bundles of various denominations (I ran out of 1000-rupee notes and had to count out 21 100-rupee notes) when somebody behind me told the cashier in an impatient voice to take his money before I completed my transaction beause I was taking so much time.

I turned around and asked him, ``Motherf****r, have you kept the train waiting at the entrance to the hospital?`` When he started saying something more, I grabbed him by the throat and threatened physical violence. He asked the hospital personnel to call Security. They looked at two well-dressed persons quarreling and decided not to interfere.

The motherf****r kept quiet after that.

Unfortunately, I had not yet seen the trailer to the movie ``Snakes on the Plane``. Otherwise, I would have said, ``I am getting tired of these muthaf***ing queue-breakers at this muthaf***ing hospital.``

Shandana

Enjoyed reading it. thanks.

best wishes

nhk

The shock the writer received is nothing new. It is called cultural shock. You get a cultural shock when you leave Pakistan and a reverse cultural shock when you reach Pakistan after spending time outside especially in certain European countries. Some of the areas of life where the impact is greater than others is while driving or walking on the roads, in the shopping centers, in Government offices and especially in hospitals. However, the solution is not grabbing someone from the throat or abusing others. The best way is to chnage your ownself and hope for the others to change too.

One can always dream of Phuket island. :-) One image from my one and only visit there, many years ago, is still with me - from the hotel room I could see a carpet of palm tree-tops waving in the breeze with the ocean beyond it. And Thais - with their easy ``khop khun noi``s (``thank you``s) are indeed among the politest people on earth. But watch them kick and punch in Thai kick boxing, and you realize that these guys can be tough.

“On the plane back from smiling Thailand, where the average Buddhist`s kindness and consideration makes most Thais far better Muslims than people here could ever hope to be,”
What an opening statement! You could only view everything thru your religious prism. It only reinforces prejudices about an average Pakistani being so narrow minded. Do you seriously think that being a Muslim makes u a better human being than others by default? If one shows more kindness he or she becomes better Muslim by the same logic he must be a bad Buddhist, bad Hindu and bad Jew. I hope you are not seriousness. Wish you get more chances to see more civilized places and meet more people who are good not necessarily because of their faith but innate human goodness.

Ooooh,

Look everyone, Harimau`s trying to show he`s tough. LOL.

Umer M.

#7 Yaar, but she is funny!

Are you trying to pin a ``target`` mark on her?

Or perhaps she is just trying to ``spread her confusion`` all over you.

It already worked on good old Harimau!

Ref UmerMurtaza #8

[Ooooh,

Look everyone, Harimau`s trying to show he`s tough. LOL.]

Nope, Harimau was trying to prove he is crazy. If there are enough crazy people on this planet, people will behave properly, not knowing when they might encounter a cray or set one off.

You see, in LA people are more careful about driving after incidents of ``road rage`` where people who are pissed off by other cutting in in front of them or some such bad behavior started shooting.

In Houston this is not necessary. People openly carry rifles and shotguns in gun racks in their vehicles. Makes for a far more civilized society.

It is clear from your remark that you have mortgaged your cohones.

PS. How I hope that the pipsueak I encountered was Soysauce!

Ref Annu #5

[....However, the solution is not grabbing someone from the throat or abusing others. The best way is to chnage your ownself and hope for the others to change too.]

I stand in line in India as well as in other countries. I don`t throw trash in the streets. I separate my non-recyclable trash from bio-degrdable trash in Chennai as well as in the US. I even drive in Chennai without honking the horn.

My behavior has had no impact on others.

However, that pipsqueak behind me at the cash counter was quite as a church mouse when he found himself behind me in line at the laboratory where I was waiting for my blood to be drawn.

I would venture to say that grabbong people by their throats and threatening violence gets more immediate results.

shandana,

................. this was simply wonderful - i think i`ll read it again .............. maureen dowd, eat your heart out !

Shandana:

Many thoughts and personal experiences came to my mind from my life`s journey of doing things in India and silicon valley, before anyone else started what now is an avalanche. Only thing I can say, that the people who started from India succeeded and those who stated form the U.S. lost. So there is certainly a great hope for you.

I respect people who are determined to make it happen, despite the lure and opportunity for them to just pick and choose. This list now does include you and Farzana Versey, among others whom you may not know. At Chowk, I am indeed trying to be an observer in case of Yasser and Aisha now.

Earlier I had bet and lost to a close friend who had decided to move back to India in mid 80`s when it was not even opportunistic as it is now. Guess what I lost my bet, and he stayed back.

The dams you build can be dangerous. These can kill creativity and sanity to prepare you the best for clausterphobic living within the confines of these dams. Obviously it did not happen to you or Farzana. Indeed my friend had to curtail what he could have otherwise done, and accept to be happy with the family he got instead.

Do you think of yourselves as pioneers, and even robber barrons who won and build the west to overcome the clauterphobic confinement?

Bye,
Anil Kapuria

#13

Jesus Christ!

Man you are trying to take a perfectly agreeable funny article and turn it into SERIOUS stuff!

What the heck is wrong with you? And why are you bringing in third party names?

Now take that Metamucil, and go to bed!

And if I may add this:

Sir, you are in USA, stop dreaming of doing great things ``back home``.

Like the little red hen, they can do it themselves!

We are all responsible for our individual actions - and nothing more, nothing less!

Thank you, Shandana, and so apt for not just Karachi but much of South Asia!

Wonderful insight, must ask you, do you take notes or is all this ad-lib before crashing at night?

thank you all for reading and responding :)

veeresh, no note taking. it begins to form some time in the morning, i`m bitchy all day because i want to get it out but dont have time to, then the kids crash and i write. pieces like this flow naturally and i look at them the next day and fix as many typos as i can, rephrase a line or two. intelligent, fact based ones are harder. i have to slog. takes me up to a week for those, prolly why i haven`t done many the last few years.

anil, you are too kind. i am no pioneer. i`m just lucky to have discovered very early in life the built in mechanism that allows me to release pressure before i implode. i think everyone has one, but not neccesarily one that requires an audience.