Abdul Latif Khalid (1944-2007)

Re: # 64

Yassir,

I thought for a few days what I was going to write about. Quite honestly, (and my intentions are not to cause you pain or anger), after reading BJ's post, I thought about losing my father and remembered what it was like. It was like sleepwalking.

Losing a parent is incredibly profound. I have discovered lonliness and (paradoxically) myself. It is both blessing and curse.


Email/Im me for support. In the meantime, you are gifted with your riches of your talents, your fam, your nation.

Neembu,

Thanks for those kind words. That was a beautiful little piece.

I can't agree with your assessment of bjkumar however because of the reasons given earlier nor do I wish to make him the topic of discussion here.

PS: As far as I know Akbar did not torture/kill any guru but I will be happy to be corrected.

Einsteinwallah,

What does "Islamic type" mean exactly. If it means he loved his faith and his community ... yes he was an Islamic type.

But if it means some sort of derogatory bakwas, then I can assure you my Pakistani father was more secular, modern and open minded than any Indian on this planet.

VRV,

Thanks bro.

Yasser,

I hope u've recovered from the great tragedy. We all go thru this in our lives. U wrote it well abt the questions we face beyond the loss of our loved ones.

Hope u'd be beack after a few weeks. Rgds,

VRV

Why Islamic types obsess with fictional stories like Mughal-e-Azam I will never understand. And Salim? Is he not the same person who later tortured some Sikh Guru? So Salim could not be sensitive type shown in Mughal-e-Azam.

Re: # 37

Yassir, BJ,

I read and understood this post to be as much a condolence as the more traditional/conservative condolences. Its something you might hear at an Irish wake-the rememberings of the person's life in all its' joy, contradictions, struggle.

If you have time, listen to Katell Keineg's album Jet, particularly the song "One Hell of a Life" where she writes:

"And when we're all dead
please don't philosophize
or feel regret. Just remember me when I said
I've had One Hell of a Life!"



Yassir, when my father died, I had to give a eulogy at an event honoring him. I don't know how I did it, but it sketched out the outlines of his life. His death brought me and my family a wilderness of grief, and somehow the gift of pulling together. I am still learning about him, the resonances and complexities of his life, more than 12 years later.

This piece is a heartfelt beginning. May you grow to learn more and more about your father.

Yasser,

While one has never met you or your dad, however, one can clearly understand the deep sense of loss. In spite of how BJK would see it, your fellow chowkies can share your grief. We have interacted with you, WE KNOW YOU MAN !!!! And BJK can go fly a kite.

May Latif Sahib rest in peace.

Yasir Meray Bhai,
If being a kid is about learning how to live, then being a grown-up is about learning how to die. It's a moving experiance but I am sure , Abdul Sahab will be a satisfied man up there in heavens.

yasser, i am sorry to know about the demise of your dad. I pray to god for his soul to rest in peace.

while i may not agree with what bj said, i would like to agree on one thing though.....celebrate the life of your dad. from your writings, he lived a good clean and most importantly an honorable life...and i think that is a good cause for the celebration of his life. i'll make sure take a drink in his name tonite.

rgds,

devkant.

Yaser mian , aaap humko naheen jantey, hum bhi naheen jantey, haan aaap ko kai baar deykhaa hey.

... lufz baymaini hootey heen, haan shayed thoori see merhaam rekh deytey heen..
guzrey huway kabhi wapus naheen aatey, haan unki yadeen humeen unsay jura rekhtee heen..

zidagi mout, fana or baqa ka kheel hey, sir ka sayaa uthtaa hey or chilchilaatee dhoop phir kitnee garam hoo jaatee hey is ka andaza sirf uskoo hoota hey, joo is dhoob meen ablaa paa hoota hey...

allah aap ko himat dey.

Zeemax,

What a wonderful analogy.

To answer your question: It is a mixture of sadness, helplessness and intense love. All in all a Life-altering experience.

But I'll tell you... the questions that plague us: afterlife, death, spirit, soul etc become meaningless at that time. It is you and your sense of loss.

Manto,

I found your lines about shoveling earth over your father extremely moving. How does one feels doing that with someone whom you have admired all life and looked up to as a pillar in the foundation of one's entire personality. Yet, one has to have that shattering experience. That's the time when one 'really' grows up ... when the third wheel on his baby bike to keep you from tipping over is removed.

If it was just temporarily animated meat, as the 'free thinkers' would have us believe, then all these condolences would be meaningless. If he wasn't though, then it's a different story.

But that's not the appropriate forum to bring this up. People have different ways of looking at life & death, but none should be considered malicious. They all mean well in the end.

ijaz_gul,

Since my father was a pilot once upon a time, I was familiar with the airborne tradition of the air force and other flying units. I kept thinking of that throughout the past two weeks.

You and Aunty are lucky to have Danielle and she is lucky to have you. Same goes for your other kids. I was strengthened by what you said the other day on the phone : that you've remembered your mother every single day since your lost her. I wish to do the same for my father.

As for these two people here ... I just find it sad that some people are so intolerant of other points of view that they waste no opportunity to bring it up.

ijaz_gul,

Since my father was a pilot once upon a time, I was familiar with the airborne tradition of the air force and other flying units. I kept thinking of that throughout the past two weeks.

You and Aunty are lucky to have Danielle and she is lucky to have you. Same goes for your other kids. I was strengthened by what you said the other day on the phone : that you've remembered your mother every single day since your lost her. I wish to do the same for my father.

As for these two people here ... I just find it sad that some people are so intolerant of other points of view that they waste no opportunity to bring it up.

Yasser, there is no other way to say it.

You are a victim of your own suspicions and see things which do not exist. It is simple as that.

I do not feel mad at you because of your present condition. (Ranjit is evil for egging you on!)

And I stand by my assertion that a whole bunch of strangers - who never knew your dad from the man Adam -showing up and saying "how sorry I am" is meaningless and in my view - an act of fakery!

That's all.