Abused Husbands

Re: # 112
dear nb...for me the issue is of human suffering. who ever is abused whether women or men or children need to get social support and professional help. in my opinion human beings are human beings before they are muslims or hindus or sikhs or jews or atheists....we all need to work together to decrease human suffering and increase quality of life. in canada professional help is free so patients do not have to pay. more and more women are getting help and going to women's shelters. there are still no shelters for men so they do not get help and suffer silently. thank you for your comments.
sincerely sohail

Re: # 103
partha b...
adbhut maal to!!! India te ekhono "wife abusers" will outnumber "husband abusers" by 10000:1. So, you expect law should be framed based on exception and not trend...
Our 2nd last president was Dalit, so India should withdraw reservation and other laws protecting rights of dalits!!!!!...
aar bou, misti kore ekta duto lathi ba thappar marloi ba...tate ki ase jai...

Re: # 112
nb...
Which god? If it is arabic moon god (as described by Mo), I can say...
Revival of spiritual leaders like Sri Sri Ravisankar, Swami Ramdev within middle class people indicates that they are quite useful and in many cases more useful than most MBBS,MD.... doctors(like many Marwaris and Shettys are better skilled than IIM MBAs)....You can watch the TV commercial of Huch (or Airtel?), which provides a solution to handle abusive wife...

Re: # 111

nb, seriously, when it happens the other way around ( husband hen pecks wife ), that is when it is called domestic abuse - which in India, is punishable with jail - with immediate arrests of the husband and all else the woman cares to blame for her damaged ego. While the husband never usually complains, since he is so used to a misandric culture and feminist state, which does not tolerate complaining males.

Actually, I HAD to take on the issue of marriage with you, since you had proclaimed that I should not marry ideally. But I hope it is clear to you that I want to remain hen-peccked for the rest of my life. And now, I seem to have found a near-perfectionist on this board! ;) LOL


SPEAK UP MALES! SPEAK UP! ELSE YOU WILL REMAIN SUBJUGATED TO FEMINISM! WAKE UP!

Dr Sohail, I was disturbed by some interactors saying that only those who turn away from God need psychiatric intervention. It seems incredibly cruel to me that not only do we not acknowledge the depth of grief that so many patients face, many of them primarily suffering from difficult life circumstances, like this patient here; we also turn around and blame the victim for his own misery.
This is so commonly seen, particularly with religious zealots, and therefore in South Asia. What is the way out of this, do you think?

Parthaab, you raised the topic of hen-pecking, not I. So clearly it's not my fetish.
In my opinion, when women treat men the way men often treat women, those men are called hen-pecked. You won't agree of course...

Re: # 108
Dear Essensaur, you have raised a valid point. In one article one can focus only on one aspect of the issue. When we focus on reasons they can range from biological to psychological to social and cultural. Parents are significant role models. Children who grow up in abusive families have a tendency to continue abuse as they have not learnt how to resolve conflcits peacefully. Men as well as women who are abused by their partners also have serious self esteem issues. I try to help them gain self confidence. When people develop self respect they only get involved in mutually respectful relationships. I am suspicious of that love that is not accompanied with respect. Thanks for your comments and questions. I will think more about them. sincerely sohail

Re: # 107

a1, you can look up this link

http://www.csulb.edu/~mfiebert/assault.htm

and see Sohail personally if the laughter is still coming!


nb, on a lighter note, hen-pecking is perfectly legal in India. Even abusive relations ( from females alone ) are accepted by the judiciary. So carry on with your favourite fetish. LOL

Sohail Sahib, did you deliberately avoid writing about the root causes of such abusive relatioships?

Why is it that the surviving spouse is the first party the police want to investigate closely when the other spouse dies in suspicious circumstances, regardless of whether or not the relatioship was generally known to be abusive?

What is the role of extent of sexual frustration in such abusive relationships?

Could it be the fact that a man's sexual prowess weakens much before his ability to inflict physical abuse on the spouse be a reason that women start resenting their husbands, and depending upon the social/legal scenario, even turn into abusers themselves?

Are conservative societies more prone to spousal abuse due to their worldview of sexual relatioships?

Questions, Questions ...

Best regards, E

this article has been here for some time,and everytime i read the title i can't help laughing!

Did you want to be henpecked then? There are people who deal with odd fetishes, you could consult them.

Re: # 104

nb, if I dont get married, who will hen-peck me? You?

Parthaab, don't get married, there is no compulsion.

Read these news:

1) http://in.news.yahoo.com/32/20090119/1053/tnl-a-costly-divorce.html

2) Being jobless no ground to deny maintenance
http://www.zeenews.com/nation/2008-12-09/489621news.html

3) http://www.expressindia.com/latest-news/A-person-who-cannot-raise-his-family-has -no-right-to-get-married/301868/

'A person who cannot raise his family has no right to get married' "I don't care where the money comes from. If he can't earn enough, then he has no right to get married."

A typical patriarchal, octogenarian Judge's views!!
We should accept this is how all our Judges and advocate view marriages and women! IMHO, men should not get married EVEN IF they are earning/employed.

This is what I call the hypocrisy of feminists who want the benefits of tradition and modernity together. Sorry, I am no fool like my fellow Indian men. I know what is happening and I am ahead of the impact of culture. Transitions are no excuse to discriminate men. Feminists asked for equal opportunites. They got it and more. Alimony is misandry. Alimony is legal terrorism. See www.supari.org/alimony

Re: # 97

BJ Sahib

i am still waiting for Chowk staff to explain why they filtered my post, therefore kindly include my protest with yours.

Thanks

Arif

tahir sahib (re #76),

… thanks for the reminder. Ummah has made great progress in the past 100 years … which is plain for all to see; so be happy now …