Not My God

Smooth narration. Meeran Bibi well portrayed.

When prayers are knocked down, 'Not My God', 'Not Good God' is often an instant reaction, hushed down by most - that's where 'the nomadic' (adjective's negotiable) Meeran Bibi took an edge.

Sarah it's nicely narrated.

Good work Sarah, I love this story.

Re: # 19
"Thank you tahir. However what you point out is the adjective, and what I have used is a verb."

Now I must spill the beans. I used a new variety of an adverb that is licensed only to banned writers, and with which they may replace the ole' verb!

:)

#14 Posted by leenah on May 2, 2009 10:28:28 am

((((@ Philosopher,

Nice zauq!
I was aware of this one though,

Apna falsafa jhaar raha hoon
ye Faraghat nahi tau aur kiya hai ))))

aahan..Mohatrama Tashee farmaa liyee jiyee

Apni faraghat deekha raha hoon
ye falsafa nahin tau aur kiya hai.

Nice fluent narration and impressive depiction of character. With infighting going on, the story makes even more relevance in the current context.

Keep writing. Missing your sensitive, touching and blatant ilogs lately. Thoroughly enjoyed them as a reader.Hope we'll have more coming our way...

my first note here,

I am never much of a reader but somehow I finished it and it's well written.

I would like to add something here with reference to one post by a person who has pasted alot from quran and hadith to justify a killing of a non-believer or infidel. first of all Islam never allows that, if it ever was then Mohammed (PBUH) would have done it himself but he was ever kind to them.

When quran talks about killing of non-believers, it refers to a point in time but sadly Mullas of our time have twisted them or left them unexplained and use it to spread more voilence, in the name of Islam.

good work miss, keep it up.

Re: # 17
Thank you tahir. However what you point out is the adjective, and what I have used is a verb.
http://www.collinslanguage.com/results.aspx could be of help.

Re: # 15,
Sarah, my comment (either #10, or #14) was meant to appreciate and not belittle your effort. What concerns me is the quality of what I read and not if it is a piece of fiction or an extract from your biography. What I wanted to stress was the point that it did not "look" (even if it was) 'cooked up' or 'made up', such was the spontaneity!

Happy writing.

Re: # 14
"..is really impressing"

Corection:

...is really IMPRESSIVE

:)

Re: # 12
"You wouldn't believe it, that is exactly what I feared would follow my comment!"

Have no fear! Other people (worthless ones actually) think I'm being predictable here but this is all under-cover operation! THIS is what throws 'Chowq Stuffed' off balance.

"Good to start knowing people around ...."

:)

PS: The terms 'Chowq Stuffed' and 'Ban Chowqed' are copyrighted in my name.

Tahir sahib, leenah i have just one comment..
I write fiction and I'm told it's autobiography, I write autobiography and I'm told it's fiction, so since I'm so dim and they're so smart, let them decide what it is or it isn't.�
Roth
And i think all fiction stems from real life.. yes most of the characters in this story are borrowed from my own reality:)

And yes Sarah, there's one more thing that I had to appreciate, (which had actually made me read the article twice). It was the 'detail' of the portrait of Meeran bibi. The intricacy with which her character sketch was portrayed, is really impressing. For me Meeran bibi remains no more a stranger!
Well done!!!


@ Philosopher,

Nice zauq!
I was aware of this one though,

Apna falsafa jhaar raha hoon
ye Faraghat nahi tau aur kiya hai

#11 #12

Be-sabab oos se mein lad raha hoon

ye Mohabat nahin tau aur kiya hai.

Re: # 11
:)
You wouldn't believe it, that is exactly what I feared would follow my comment!
Good to start knowing people around ..... :)


Nice weekend all

Re: # 10
"No one had to ask if it was a true account or not"

So, Miss Zahid, is it a true story?

:)

Sarah, I really liked the spontaneous flow of your story. There were a few points that escaped me, for example, the climax, which (I think) could have had a bit of background or if not so, a bit of detail would have done well than to end the story on a note too sudden to swallow. (unexpected endings are good but sudden ones are not so, especially if there were two emotional focal points: her shifting of faith and the revelation of her loss).
However, the story had a natural rhythm. This, I think is the strongest aspect of your writing, its spontaneity. No one had to ask if it was a true account or not. So, congrats :)


Cheers.