Indus

Brilliant. I am impressed. Yes, sons of the same mother and they have sold her into prostitution. If she had had only one son things would have been a whole lot different.

I read it once, I read it twice and I may read it the third time as well. The similes and metaphors are beautiful.

Though I disagree on the picture portrayed and will write on that later.

PS:Please excuse my half input, I am busy in attending to some uninvited guests, Uncle Floyd and Aunt Gertrude. Uncle Floyd has already left but the fact Aunt Gertrude can visit any time requires some preparations. So I will be back.

Regards

Rabia bibi:

Shall refrain from posting any comments on your poem for now.

I would like to reiterate a comment I made recently on the (ab)use of postscripts or sub-headers -----``I cringe when a postscript or a bold by-line in an article or poem appears. As if the writer is not content with what has already been written; (and) wants to control or channelise the reader`s thoughts in a certain direction. Maybe it is just me! I`d rather explore the nuances of the written piece on my own. Admittedly, one can soar with feelings or be crippled by doubts. But that is a chance as a reader I`d like to take.``

regards,

Should I or shouldn`t I?
Should I or shouldn`t I?
Should I or shouldn`t I?

(the wrestling with myself is over).

I better!

I`d argue against publishing TWO article/poem by the same writer on page 1. Firstly, it gives the impression that there is a dearth of writers contributing to Chowk. And secondly, Chowk has commented in the past about the long backlog of articles in the waiting queue. (There, by magic, my articles disappear from the queue, filed forever under G)!

regards,

P.S. Rabia bibi: Hope you understand this has nothing to do with your poem.

Rabia:

Beautiful sentiments, alas sentiments rarely are reality. Only the courageous convert sentiments into reality.

The dynamics of South Asian history have been very complex. The future lies in the hope. I am confident the two brothers would either produce leadership in their off-springs who would be tired of fifty-three years of hatred generated by the separation at birth. And shall have vision to lead too, else someone else shall lead them.

There is simply too much in common between these brothers that another fifty-year of hatred would not supress. Especially in the information age, where Z-TV`s and P-TV`s, and Internet, the highway for human thought, spread messages that cannot be controlled.

In replies to another article by FR Khan ``State of Confusion``, I read many exchanges directly and indirectly falling on religion. One-side (= one brother of your poem) claims religion is the basis of the nation-state, while other side claims it is not. The side claiming ``religion is not`` (= other brother)lays blame on the ``religion is`` brother for getting ``religion is`` people in his nation-state elected to the office. Thus, ``religion is not`` brother is acknowledging that ``religion is`` the basis of a democratic election, therefore, a basis of nation-state.

The looser always blames the outsider. A win-win compromise is always a loose-loose compromise too. Both sides must loose something to make a win-win possible, to understand this requires maturity. Unfortunately, after turning their mother to prostitution, brothers never grew up to ease the pain of separation at birth.

Some day it will all change, because the Future lies in hope.

To temporal,

I have to agree with you there, two poems by the same person, several articles by the same person, yes it points to a paucity of articles, what ever else the chowk staff want us to believe.

The talk of backlog is a typical ploy. In india people rush to doctors where you have to wait long hours, it shows that the doctor is `good`, if you get a prompt service, the doctor is bad. The same psyche in the chowk as well, there is a long que, rush your articles.

In support of temporal, jay, myself (funny), and other Chowkwalla:

I have submitted three articles during the past six-eight weeks or so, all were (it seems) rejected without any acknowledgement.

Sincerely, Bilal Ahmad

P.S. My posting has no bearing on the contribution of Rabia Minhas. My best wishes to her.

Just felt like conducting an analysis here:

As it appears, there are 9 articles by women writers and only 3 by male writers. I agree the 1:3 ratio should certainly be objected!

Very powerful thoughts. I enjoyed the emotion
here but as in the case of some of my own
writing, poetry sometimes has to take a back
seat to the message.
Keep writing!

Ras

Great Poem! Loved it!

Thanks

Fozia

Somehow or other everytime I sat down to put together my thoughts on what I did not agree with, I had hard time to do so. The poetess has very beautifully expressed her concerns and I cannot point out the stanza that was disturbing. The verses are very well connected.

Ok, here is what I felt:

Just picking up India and Pakistan as seperate entities and comparing them for their relationship and the history is too naive. Why not first analyze Pakistan itself ? India ?

When there is no harmony within then expecting to wear a facade of friendliness and warmth will be asking too much from both the sides. I do not know if you have read the story on Unity is Strength. How a father teaches his sons on maintaining the Unity with an example and finally gives them the pros and cons.

When the sensitivity is dying to have unity within ones family then any complaints about the neighbour`s attitude will hold no value. No matter you have the same roots. It is not a valid argument!

A hand even having a small, square, rectangle or oblong palm supporting five fingers does not say that Hey, all of them look alike. Even the supporting Palm is One.

On a lighter note, I think both the kids have grown older and are practising the real world tactics. Being in Valleys, it is hard to realize the worldliness :-)

Regards

Such a beautiful poem. As I read, I felt as if a painting was beginning to come to life. Please keep writing.

Peace!