Explaining it to an American Friend

Reply #: 347 Stuka

[`Hey Ali, how about you kill two birds with one stone. While checking out the dog owner`s association, pick up something for your mom too...word on the street is she has a preference for Golden Retrievers..`]

I`ll get a mongrel for your mother too, Stuka. She `ll then be the envy of other Khatri women, and an ideal worth emulating for your sisters.

RSaxena!

anNy did read the subtext of my message correctly. She made a valid point: we ought to be even handed in our criticisms.

Romair, here is your proof that Pakistanis are not any less intelligent than Indians :)

binifer,

Wow! Congratulations!! That is very good news. When is the D day? All I can say is that some men get lucky :)

anNy,

You do have a point. How about everyone give up on sexual innuendos? Such comments rarely relate to the topic at hand, except to confirm the vacuity of one`s arguments. Sexual innuendos elicit references to sexual acts, and sexual acts, unfortunately (or fortunately) involve women.

The mothers, wives, sisters, girlfriends of everyone deserve respect. The best way to maintain that respect is for everyone to climb out of the nauseous gutter of this very public sexual discourse.

The sheer hypocrisy in the statement below is staring the reader in the face. Too bad the author is too blind to see it.

``very nice eklavya..first zafar saab and now you..just because stuka happens to be one of yours, the blatant budtameezi that he does is to be excused in this witty manner; rather than tell him off (like we do urstruly and ylh and ali when they get out of hand) you tell him he`s too good, implying that ali is bad and its alright to say such horrid things about his mom?

whats wrong with you? or rather with you men? and stuka if you have a problem with ali and must rise to rsaxena`s defence, you be bad to HIM, make fun of his legs, his marital status, his anatomy, his wrists, if you have to..dont drag the women folk into this ESPECIALLY mothers...budtameez mard (that includes you too eklavya)``

What`s got anNy`s knickers in a knot?

Dostmittar, thank you :--) You are well?

Rajan, you are coming down for my wedding?

Eklavya to stuka:

``Nooooooo! You are far too good to descend into the gutter to fight someone who lives there.``

very nice eklavya..first zafar saab and now you..just because stuka happens to be one of yours, the blatant budtameezi that he does is to be excused in this witty manner; rather than tell him off (like we do urstruly and ylh and ali when they get out of hand) you tell him he`s too good, implying that ali is bad and its alright to say such horrid things about his mom?

whats wrong with you? or rather with you men? and stuka if you have a problem with ali and must rise to rsaxena`s defence, you be bad to HIM, make fun of his legs, his marital status, his anatomy, his wrists, if you have to..dont drag the women folk into this ESPECIALLY mothers...budtameez mard (that includes you too eklavya)

Re AnNy 328:

AnNy ji,

Aajkal to hum Chowk kay niwasi ho gaye hain :-)

Re Bapu 338:

Bapu,

Did you search for that article on the net? If u did, the mind boggles at the thought of the search string you may have used. Of course it may be a field you specialise in, so who are we to snuff out the lamp of learning.

Re Arrested Development 338:

Looks like I`ll have to type very slowly for you.

As Wali Ali Shaikhpeer once said ``Naam may kya hai, a Gulabo by any other name....``, so while the name Subroto may be from Bengal, I may not. And I am pretty sure AnNy read your polite post and erased it from her mind. Old Wali Ai gain springs to mind ``What shall I call thee when thou art a man ?``

Take care

Subroto

Stuka, ``arrested development`` and Bapu are the same vopu. See the use of comma again. This is so unique. Why man why? Why can`t you post under one name? If you have substance you will be accepted whether you are Bijli or Badal or Barsat. Now don`t get the idea.

Harimou, (ref # 341). There is no need at all for you to make derogatory remarks about our Prophet Mohammed. It makes you sound like a drooling extremist, and we know you wouldn`t want that (drooling or otherwise)... Please apologize for the remark.

Stuka # 347

``preference for Golden Retrievers..``

Nooooooo! You are far too good to descend into the gutter to fight someone who lives there.

Hmmm Arrested Development...what an apt handle...

Ali#1

... I was just trying to find a life partner for rsexena. I will contact my neighborhood dog owners association now; we dont want him to remain single, do we?

Hey Ali, how about you kill two birds with one stone. While checking out the dog owner`s association, pick up something for your mom too...word on the street is she has a preference for Golden Retrievers..

sattar2 #68 You write ``...comments on hero-worship will be much appreciated.``, and here are my two-taka views on this:

1. The focus of the Quran is clearly on Allah, his creation, man`s responsibilities and so on. Prophet Muhammed is mentioned in terms of circumscribing his role to that of a ``warner``. The focus of many muslims - sunnis, shias, ahmedis - is on man, not on Allah. It is this shift in focus that amounts to hero-worship. Only yesterday I saw on TV a man singing praises of Muhammed as the ``Lord of the Worlds`` and to my mind this was a travesty of Islam. Shias add other men to Muhammed and ahmedis add another man. But, as I have repeatedly said, regardless of whether you are sunni or shia or ahmedi, the moment you start talking personalities and forget the message, you have gone off course.

2. In secular terms, we have hero-worship too. Men in power are venerated, poor men are rubbed into the dust.

3. What remains to be answered is this: Why are we unable to focus on concepts (like Allah) or principles (fairness, forgiveness, peace and so on) when the Quran emphasizes that, and find it easy to slip into worshipping (in de facto terms) ordinary men? The answer is simple: small minds focus on other people, better minds focus on principles.

As I have said, you have a right to be considered a muslim if that is what you think you are (since these are matters where even the Prophet is told in the Quran are not for him to decide), you do not have a right to claim that your interpretation of the Quran cannot be questioned. If we can agree on this, we can end this discussion.

JAHANNEM, OUTER DARKNESS—The hijackers who carried out the Sept. 11 attacks on the World Trade Center and Pentagon expressed confusion and surprise Monday to find themselves in the lowest plane of Na`ar, Islam`s Hell.



``I was promised I would spend eternity in Paradise, being fed honeyed cakes by 67 virgins in a tree-lined garden, if only I would fly the airplane into one of the Twin Towers,`` said Mohammed Atta, one of the hijackers of American Airlines Flight 11, between attempts to vomit up the wasps, hornets, and live coals infesting his stomach. ``But instead, I am fed the boiling feces of traitors by malicious, laughing Ifrit. Is this to be my reward for destroying the enemies of my faith?``



The rest of Atta`s words turned to raw-throated shrieks, as a tusked, asp-tongued demon burst his eyeballs and drank the fluid that ran down his face.

According to Hell sources, the 19 eternally damned terrorists have struggled to understand why they have been subjected to soul-withering, infernal torture ever since their Sept. 11 arrival.

``There was a tumultuous conflagration of burning steel and fuel at our gates, and from it stepped forth these hijackers, the blessed name of the Lord already turning to molten brass on their accursed lips,`` said Iblis The Thrice-Damned, the cacodemon charged with conscripting new arrivals into the ranks of the forgotten. ``Indeed, I do not know what they were expecting, but they certainly didn`t seem prepared to be skewered from eye socket to bunghole and then placed on a spit so that their flesh could be roasted by the searing gale of flatus which issues forth from the haunches of Asmoday.``

``Which is strange when you consider the evil with which they ended their lives and those of so many others,`` added Iblis, absentmindedly twisting the limbs of hijacker Abdul Aziz Alomari into unspeakably obscene shapes.

``I was told that these Americans were enemies of the one true religion, and that Heaven would be my reward for my noble sacrifice,`` said Alomari, moments before his jaw was sheared away by faceless homunculi. ``But now I am forced to suckle from the 16 poisoned leathern teats of Gophahmet, Whore of Betrayal, until I burst from an unwholesome engorgement of curdled bile. This must be some sort of terrible mistake.``

Exacerbating the terrorists` tortures, which include being hollowed out and used as prophylactics by thorn-cocked Gulbuth The Rampant, is the fact that they will be forced to endure such suffering in sight of the Paradise they were expecting.

``It might actually be the most painful thing we can do, to show these murderers the untold pleasures that would have awaited them in Paradise, if only they had lived pious lives,`` said Praxitas, Duke of Those Willingly Led Astray. ``I mean, it`s tough enough being forced through a wire screen by the callused palms of Halcorym and then having your entrails wound onto a stick and fed to the toothless, foul-breathed swine of Gehenna. But to endure that while watching the righteous drink from a river of wine? That can`t be fun.``

Underworld officials said they have not yet decided on a permanent punishment for the terrorists.

``Eventually, we`ll settle on an eternal and unending task for them,`` said Lord Androalphus, High Praetor of Excruciations. ``But for now, everyone down here wants a crack at them. The legions of fang-wombed hags will take their pleasure on their shattered carcasses for most of this afternoon. Tomorrow, their flesh will be melted from their bones like wax in the burning embrace of the Mother of Cowards. The day after that, they`ll be sodomized by the Fallen and their bowels shredded by a demonic ejaculate of burning sand. Then, on Sunday, Satan gets them all day. I can`t even imagine what he`s got cooked up for them.``

(courtesy onion.com)

Subroto

“And the rest of you please don`t bring Biryani/Kulfi/sundae and general khane ka mention amongst mutual expressions of hatred being carried out here. Sari nafrat dilute ho jati hai.”

….yeah, it does take all the fun out of the she-said-he-said/pakistan-didn’t-do-it-india-did-india-didn’t-do-it-pakistan-did rhetoric doesn’t it?

binifer

“moti? I`m snorting here scout. stopid bltch eats like a bloody pig and doesnt gain one single pound. she has 12 meals a day. i swear she does. she has breakfast, comes over has breakfast at my place then has chai paratha after the morning class at hillpark with other friends, 2 plates biryani, assorted samosas at uni, lunch at home, lunch at my home, grabs a mcchicken after work, comes home to tea, eats all the time till dinner and then snacks till her midnight dinner. MOTI, YOU ASK?. manhoosmaree has friggin abs. if i didnt love her so much I`d shoot her. I, who put on 5 pounds when i *look * at cake.

…..and i thought i was a glutton….DISGUSTING is what I say….anNy, u are henceforth BANNED from mentioning food or anything closely allied to it on chowk…..

“P.S: she would also steal my lunch in school.”

…..anNy, you didn’t!!!