Parveen and Asad
Umair Raja September 7, 2003
#23 Posted by roohi on September 14, 2003 9:08:30 am
Umair - Enjoyed this!
BTW You might like the Mirza Ghalib translations and audios on boloji.com. Check them out here http://www.boloji.com/ghalib/index.htm
BTW You might like the Mirza Ghalib translations and audios on boloji.com. Check them out here http://www.boloji.com/ghalib/index.htm
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#22 Posted by ZahraJ on September 11, 2003 7:52:48 pm
Umair,
It seems that the Canadian Wind is showering its blessings on you :)
Yuk Na Shud Do Shud!
I liked the first one. The second one picks up at the end. The beginning is slightly light weight though.
I adore the following verses. I have always adored anything with Solomon`s zikr :)
How very childish of me!
``ik khel hai aurang-e-sulemaa.N mere nazadiik
ik baat hai ejaaz-e-masiihaa mere aage``
``mat puuchh ke kyaa haal hai meraa tere piichhe
tuu dekh ke kyaa rang hai teraa mere aage``
Take Care.
It seems that the Canadian Wind is showering its blessings on you :)
Yuk Na Shud Do Shud!
I liked the first one. The second one picks up at the end. The beginning is slightly light weight though.
I adore the following verses. I have always adored anything with Solomon`s zikr :)
How very childish of me!
``ik khel hai aurang-e-sulemaa.N mere nazadiik
ik baat hai ejaaz-e-masiihaa mere aage``
``mat puuchh ke kyaa haal hai meraa tere piichhe
tuu dekh ke kyaa rang hai teraa mere aage``
Take Care.
#21 Posted by Romair on September 9, 2003 4:35:41 pm
temporal #8: ``Ghalib spent the intervening years revising and rejecting his poetry…one may suspect that he had some inkling of his influence on the language and poets to come…"
Farsi bein taaba beeni naqsh haayee rang-e-rang
Bagzar az majmua-Urdu kay bay rang man aast
Pursue my Persian verse; so that you shall find in it
Patterns of many hues
Disregard my Urdu opus; for it is indeed
Insipid, colourless
(Translation of Ghalib by Riaz Ahmad)
Farsi bein taaba beeni naqsh haayee rang-e-rang
Bagzar az majmua-Urdu kay bay rang man aast
Pursue my Persian verse; so that you shall find in it
Patterns of many hues
Disregard my Urdu opus; for it is indeed
Insipid, colourless
(Translation of Ghalib by Riaz Ahmad)
#20 Posted by Romair on September 9, 2003 4:30:15 pm
Rozaiba #9: ``Wow! This was excellent Romair!``
Thanks
faisal #12: ``thanks for the translation``
You`re welcome.
hamid_81: ``Parveen Shakir was an ok Poet``
The poets on Chowk are ok poets. Those out of them that go a step higher are good poets. Those who go another step, like Parveen, are great poets. Those who go even one step furthur are Ghalib.
dost-mittar #15: ``Someohow, the translation did not capture the essence of the original``
Interestingly, it was more difficult to translate Parveen`s ghazal, than Ghalib`s. Simple terms and phrases seem harder to translate.
``And why translate Ghalib?``
Actually, this was supposed to be a comparitive piece, comparing Ghalib with another poet. It wasn`t specifically supposed to be on Parveen Shakir. Her intro was given, and Ghalib`s wasn`t since everyone knows Ghalib. I think the, ``Teaser`` on the front page confused everyone. The original, ``Teaser`` did not point to Parveen.
Thanks
faisal #12: ``thanks for the translation``
You`re welcome.
hamid_81: ``Parveen Shakir was an ok Poet``
The poets on Chowk are ok poets. Those out of them that go a step higher are good poets. Those who go another step, like Parveen, are great poets. Those who go even one step furthur are Ghalib.
dost-mittar #15: ``Someohow, the translation did not capture the essence of the original``
Interestingly, it was more difficult to translate Parveen`s ghazal, than Ghalib`s. Simple terms and phrases seem harder to translate.
``And why translate Ghalib?``
Actually, this was supposed to be a comparitive piece, comparing Ghalib with another poet. It wasn`t specifically supposed to be on Parveen Shakir. Her intro was given, and Ghalib`s wasn`t since everyone knows Ghalib. I think the, ``Teaser`` on the front page confused everyone. The original, ``Teaser`` did not point to Parveen.
#19 Posted by moulabux on September 9, 2003 2:12:48 pm
Impressive. A female friend once gave me a ghazal of Parveen Shakir. I lost it, but I remember bits and pieces of it. I`m going to put up the butchered form, and will appreciate it if someone can provide a link or paste the ghazal.
``Us nay kahaa
Garam haath wafa ke alamat hai
Main itni khush huwee
Kay saab kuch bhool gayee
Abb mujhay yaad ata hay
Us kay haath kitnay sard they``
No sentimental value, though. It`s just beautiful.
Cheers.
``Us nay kahaa
Garam haath wafa ke alamat hai
Main itni khush huwee
Kay saab kuch bhool gayee
Abb mujhay yaad ata hay
Us kay haath kitnay sard they``
No sentimental value, though. It`s just beautiful.
Cheers.
#17 Posted by temporal on September 9, 2003 12:48:39 pm
Urstruly:
pakRay jatay haiN farishtouN kay likhay per na`haq
aadmi koi humara dam-e-tehrir bhee thaa
pakRay jatay haiN farishtouN kay likhay per na`haq
aadmi koi humara dam-e-tehrir bhee thaa
#16 Posted by Urstruly on September 9, 2003 8:39:34 am
ref # 11
I think the last line in the last couplet should read as koi shakhs kabi hamara dam-e-tehrir bhi tha. Could someone plz correct me.
I think the last line in the last couplet should read as koi shakhs kabi hamara dam-e-tehrir bhi tha. Could someone plz correct me.
#15 Posted by dost_mittar on September 9, 2003 7:39:27 am
Romair:
I have not read much modern poetry but really liked Aabida Parveen`s rendering of Ku-ba-ku. Someohow, the translation did not capture the essence of the original. Not your fault as translations from one culture to another are always problematic. Still, I think there is scope for improvement. For example, I would modify
``Wherever he went; he returned
He came back to me
His fickle virtue is enough
To keep me happy``
to:
Wherever he went
He came back to me
This fickle loyalty is
His only redeemig virtue
And why translate Ghalib?
Urstruly:
Whatever happened to Samy?
I have not read much modern poetry but really liked Aabida Parveen`s rendering of Ku-ba-ku. Someohow, the translation did not capture the essence of the original. Not your fault as translations from one culture to another are always problematic. Still, I think there is scope for improvement. For example, I would modify
``Wherever he went; he returned
He came back to me
His fickle virtue is enough
To keep me happy``
to:
Wherever he went
He came back to me
This fickle loyalty is
His only redeemig virtue
And why translate Ghalib?
Urstruly:
Whatever happened to Samy?
#14 Posted by hamid_81 on September 9, 2003 7:34:17 am
Parveen Shakir was an ok Poet, whereas Ghalib is Insurpassable!
#13 Posted by hamid_81 on September 9, 2003 7:34:17 am
Parveen Shakir was an ok Poet, whereas Ghalib is Insurpassable!
#12 Posted by faisaluno on September 9, 2003 7:34:16 am
romair:
thanks for the translation, even a nalaiq like me enjoyed reading these poems. and i also remember watching parveen shakir on p.t.v. couple of times in the late eighties. on one of those occasions, she was wearing either a bright red shalwar kameez or a bright red saree which was quite a contrast to the gray set of that ptv mushaira. the other interesting part of the scene was that she was completely surrounded by much older men who appeared to be totally mesmerized by her. and when i saw this scene, i remember thinking what the hell cause in those days you did not see women smiling or acting so uninhibited on ptv (hasina moeen plays might be the other exception). kind of sad that we have lost so many of our very good artists at such young ages.
#11 Posted by Urstruly on September 9, 2003 7:15:51 am
The two couplets that absolutely sold Mirza to me were:
Dard-e-dil likhoon kab tak,jaaoon unko dikhla doon
Ungliyaan figar apni, khhaama khhoon-chakaan apna
Farishton kay likhay peh pakRRAy jaate haiN na-haq
Koi aadmi hmara dam-e-tehrir bhi tha
#10 Posted by Romair on September 8, 2003 12:12:28 pm
Could I request you, if possible, to reformat the second piece, in two-line couplets, something like what follows(without the dots). It maybe difficult for readers to read it in its current four line format:
.......................................baaziichaa-e-atfaal hai duniyaa mere aage
.......................................hotaa hai shab-o-roz tamaashaa mere aage
A children’s playground; the world before me
Nightly and daily, watching its pageantry
.....................................ik khel hai aurang-e-sulemaa.N mere nazadiik
.....................................ik baat hai ejaaz-e-masiihaa mere aage
Solomon’s throne; but, a game to me
Miracles of Messiah; a mere simplicity
Thanks…..
.......................................baaziichaa-e-atfaal hai duniyaa mere aage
.......................................hotaa hai shab-o-roz tamaashaa mere aage
A children’s playground; the world before me
Nightly and daily, watching its pageantry
.....................................ik khel hai aurang-e-sulemaa.N mere nazadiik
.....................................ik baat hai ejaaz-e-masiihaa mere aage
Solomon’s throne; but, a game to me
Miracles of Messiah; a mere simplicity
Thanks…..
#9 Posted by rozaiba on September 8, 2003 10:34:42 am
Wow! This was excellent Romair! Brilliant translations. You`ve got the talent and knack for it!
Abida Parveen did a beautiful rendition of `kuu-ba-kuu`.
Abida Parveen did a beautiful rendition of `kuu-ba-kuu`.
#8 Posted by temporal on September 8, 2003 9:46:14 am
Umair:
Do keep in mind though, that Ghalib wrote most of his Urdu stuff before the age of 25, and then thirty or so years later. In between, he completely concentrated on Persian, which he considered to be his true poetry. So, in his 40s Ghalib wasn’t doing much Urdu…
…Ghalib spent the intervening years revising and rejecting his poetry…one may suspect that he had some inkling of his influence on the language and poets to come…some scholars have collected and published his rejected stuff...if you get a chance have a read...
…compare this with the present breed of poets who publish one book after another!…volume is never a criteria for quality…
…on another note…and not taking anything away from parveen…there have been other women poets of note…who have brought fresh diction and sensitivity to Urdu poetry..
among the older generation
Ada Jafri
Zehra Nigah
Parveen`s contemporaries:
Kishawar Naheed
Fehmida Reyaz
Sara Shagufta
Shahida Hasan
Fatima Hasan
Ghalib, for all his greatness, I believe, never ventured beyond India.
..hunh?….what is that got to do with intellect, observation, thought, expression?
Just FYI Immanuel Kant (1724-1804) spend his entire life within 40 kms of his birth place…
...t
Do keep in mind though, that Ghalib wrote most of his Urdu stuff before the age of 25, and then thirty or so years later. In between, he completely concentrated on Persian, which he considered to be his true poetry. So, in his 40s Ghalib wasn’t doing much Urdu…
…Ghalib spent the intervening years revising and rejecting his poetry…one may suspect that he had some inkling of his influence on the language and poets to come…some scholars have collected and published his rejected stuff...if you get a chance have a read...
…compare this with the present breed of poets who publish one book after another!…volume is never a criteria for quality…
…on another note…and not taking anything away from parveen…there have been other women poets of note…who have brought fresh diction and sensitivity to Urdu poetry..
among the older generation
Ada Jafri
Zehra Nigah
Parveen`s contemporaries:
Kishawar Naheed
Fehmida Reyaz
Sara Shagufta
Shahida Hasan
Fatima Hasan
Ghalib, for all his greatness, I believe, never ventured beyond India.
..hunh?….what is that got to do with intellect, observation, thought, expression?
Just FYI Immanuel Kant (1724-1804) spend his entire life within 40 kms of his birth place…
...t
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