A-Okay

Interesting Article. But mostly pathetic responses. It amazes me that people here are completely ignoring the fact that as Muslims, we need to look at what Islam says about the subject. Many scholars allow Abortions in case of `jabr`(rape, incest) etc. But to use it as brithcontrol is simply Ignorant! And those of you suggesting that men use condoms are just as ignorant. Q: What do you call couples who use condoms for birth control? A: PARENTS!!!
But then again, the `look to the west` process of sanskritization(a`la Pillai`s novel: Scavenger`s Son) that our society follows tells us to shun everything eastern and Islamic, and sing the mantra of Women`s Lib and Woman`s choice crap...
Amazing, simply amazing that about 19 responses, no one mentions a word about its legality Islamically.

Interesting...highly interesting a bit too controversial because i agree with u WHY is it ohk for a married woman to have a so - called `legal` abortion when it isnt for an unmarried woman. Ohk fine i know our religion forbids us to take part in any such `act` before marriage therefore giving us a complete and total refuge from pregnancy before marriage BUT we all know some things are inevitable. I`m not saying its ohk pre-marital sex but i`m saying that when we KNOW its bound to happen with how the times are these days then this is bogus the idea that abortion is ohk for married women & not for unmarried girls. It is disappointing how we know the growing stigma`s in our society but we try to deny them. Newayzz....good write! liked reading it!

Hi,
You did`nt say where all of this happened. But that does not matter. Where ever it happened it was a shameful act by the woman who got the abortion. And there are two reasons. First, she consented to the killing of an innocent bystander. Second, she is unmarried and slept with someone. Now dont you go blaming society for wrinkling their nose and smelly rubbish like Maliha.
And Malihas sister is only to blame in one count, that is murder. But by what I could make out from the article, she is pretty rich. And if there is one thing you learn about our culture is that the rich are always right. Which is sad. But then our culture is a crap pile of indian movies and western obscenities and those who suck up to the rich.
If Malihas sister were a poor person, hehe, that henna orange haired doctor would be killing her baby.
It sickens me how you people do cray, unhealthy, unholy, downright shameful things, and expect society to look up to you and care for you. How totally idiotic can a person get?

Soniah,

This is a vivid and empathetic description of the trial of a woman making this decision. Such empathy in my book, is an undervalued quality. It is what distinguishes ideologues from critically thinking writers who remember that they live in a society of innumerable decisions made by complex human beings.

What I find interesting about this piece is how Maliha ceases to control her own body in the dehumanizing manner in which this process takes place. It also underscores the appalling conditions in which desperate women undertake this procedures. Such a procedure, which is a woman`s right of her reproductive abilities, is made to seem negative at the very least.

Hope to read more from you.

I`ve been reading and enjoying Soniah Kamal`s articles for a while since she started writing for the Sunday Times. Glad to see she`s made it to Chowk. Looking forward to more contributions from you.

A very painfully graphic approach.
Maybe what we all forget when writing about such things is that we live in a country with a lot of other problems, besides the social stigma for unmarried mothers (which probably has roots in our religion and culture).
Fortunately for our heart & soul, this wild-heart of ours yearns for reasoning and justice in even such trying times. Or maybe the need for order should be the highest at such times.
This negative attitude, the stigma and the whole problem of the order-an-abortion-TO-GO can change with education and progress. Not to mention, some rational thinking from the government on regularizing abortions, even of the kind that are deemed illegal right now.

Some really good writing here by a newcomer to CHOWK.

Welcome Soniah Kamal.

The topic is depressing but about a sad reality.

We need more writing like this from the Pakistani perspective.

Ras

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I remember reading this article when it was first published in Sunday. Great work Soniah. There have been many discussions on the legality of abortion in religion and our society, but i guess it is more of a personal choice than anything else.

``Unmarried mothers are maligned but a married mother using abortion as birth control society deems A-okay.``

The reason is that most societies consider the traditional family (man, his wife, their children) to be the basic unit/foundation of society and marriage to be a primary social institution.

In this situation, it is not just unmarried mothers who may be maligned, simply unmarried women too, may not be wholeheartedly accepted.

Where social interdependence/acceptance is a big factor in peoples` lives, it is difficult for individuals to make choices contrary to societal norms. Within ambit of the institution of marriage, however, the man and woman get a lot more acceptance of their choices than unmarried individuals get. Hence what you say happens.

I am not sure why some of us are getting entangled in the legitimacy of abortion because this is not the issue being addressed by the author. It seems as if the intentional curtness of the column is taken as accidental murkiness. Anyways, the main issue is the justification and acceptance of abortion in wedlock as that opposed to pre-marital (could be extra-marital, rape, etc). This is a glimpse into the hypocrisy of society at large. The imagery used especially in the first half of the column is spine-chilling; one can almost feel the anguish and fear of Meliha as opposed to the much safer and humane treatment of her married sister committing the same act. If anyone is interested in a movie-production exploring similar issue then watch If the Walls Could Talk (starring Demi Moore). One last comment even though this is not about legitimacy of abortion; if anything, males should be the last ones to pass any judgement on the legality of abortion whether its due to necessity or other factors. Let a woman decide for herself what is best for her.

#8

Yes, Ordinary Hindu, the last I heard it was just above 950 for females for every 1000 males.

It is terribly sad.

#2 by Naqshbandi on January 9, 2004 1:10pm PT

[Abortion is not wrong in all cases. Sometimes it might be necessary. However I do think it is wrong to use it as a type of birth control. ]

Dear Naqshbandi,

Yes, it`s not advisable to use abortion as the only birth control method.

However, no birth control method is fool proof. Even abstainance isn`t (remember Mary). Some are 80 %, some 99 %. What would one do if they get pregnant despite the precautions. Let`s not go into why some husbands would not wear condoms, what if a girl is raped, wants to finish college, doesn`t like her husband (considering divorce) etc.

When it comes to abortion, no uterus no vote on the subject. And for women, not your uterus, no vote either.

The question the author of the article raised is with the stigma of abortion. Disdaining it will always stigmatise women who undergo it for whatever reason.

Let`s leave birth control whichever way one wants it (smart or not) to the individual and her doctor.

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Jawahara

The ratio must be worse now. The treatment of the girl child, before birth and after, is a terrible indictment of our society :(

The article is sort of inconclusive. There is something missing as the writer does not seem to have a clear point of view, other than just drawing comparisions.

I believe that elective abortion is illegal in Pakistan. Abortion is permitted only in case of danger to the mother or to the child.