Visitor

the ending was fabulous...it takes the whole credit of the story. Associating the objects with past memories and future intentions was a tool well-used.
keep it up!
Sana Gulraiz

Good elements: I liked the setting (old lover comes back-uncertain, changed times, the time line of feelings molding into one moment)... but this could have been woven to have us react to the character`s personal story more and make it a more appealing read. I didn`t feel the turmoil the dude must be feeling coming back ie guilt, anger, bitter, longing. Nor did I feel reciprocal balancing of personality from Cara`s character. Even Y`s character could have expressed a bit more to weave substance into the story.

The idea of dualizing objects with humans - but that full force of personal histories convolved with everyday objects didnt come out as strongly as probably intended (?). Maybe the story didnt really have as jumbled up a narrative time-wise as it should have to make things jaded ? maybe the description of the objects vs. histories was a little sparse?

It is good to see your work here though. keep it up!

very nicley written and an easy read........but, what`s the point ? ....... maybe, sometimes, you feel like writing even when you have nothing to write about ...... that`s okay too ...... not nearly as bad as temporal`s ``upoetry``......... now, that is sheer torture !

Boring.

``Blake scratched his goatee``...that didnt sound right.

It was a nice story...well written.......predictable though.
Enjoyed reading it...

good one zia :)