What will I teach my daughter?

Azmat, that was one pathetic article. I mean, that was really bad. Your logic is twisted, your beliefs are twisted and your faith is twisted. You talk about the word of God but don`t want to go to the mosque. Well, doesn`t the quran actually tell you to pray (not necessarily in a mosque though)?

I feel sorry for your daughter already.

Mr. Hussain,
I did read your article and I do agree with some of the things you say, but I do find it a little confusing that what you are trying to teach your daughter is the basic apect of Islam yet you say that you will not teach her about Islam. True that the way you were taught was wrong but if you read Koran in a language like Urdu or English you will learn a lot of things that you dont know yet and will probably find out that all of the things you mentioned like being good to yourself, to your neighbors, or to anybody else are already there. Now regarding praying 5 times or learning Koran or other things like that which everyone has to do - of course no one can push you to do anything of that nature because you know what is best for your child but wouldnt you rather have her make her own decision. You are very proud in asserting the fact that you will teach her about every other religion so I am assuming that you have learnt about them also. But you somehow forget to mention whether you have taken time to learn about Islam. If you dont know Arabic then I am sure you can still read the Urdu or English translation. Then why dont you let your daughter read the Quran in English. That way she will understand everything that is there and then you wont have to waste your time in teaching her about other religions. She wont be learning from a Mullah who will only be concerned with making money but would rather have a deep knowledge of what Islam is. You can be her guide through this but of course for that you will have to read it in English first. Just reciting verses from Koran is of course not the answer. I have finished Koran 5 times but I never learnt anything until I started reading it in English and actually understanding it. Now, I understand that being in America all of a sudden opens up every Pakistani and Indian mind and they start seeing the so-called truth but that does not mean that one forgets how important religious education is to truly understand the moral aspects of society.

author writes ``Now my wife has some misguided views about raising our daughter she seems to think that she is going to impart the same religious values and rituals that she practices. As you may understand by now that is not going to happen.``

This is a strange article on many fronts. I will not dwell on the religious aspects of it, since author has every right to raise his daughter in whichever way he likes. However I am particularly preturbed by his causually marginalizing the role of child`s mother in raising her.

That pretty much shows that the author has a lot of growing up to do. And when he does grow up, a lot of other strange twists in this article will get resolved too.

load of crap. First you are not that good looking (although I admit kid is really cute, may she live a happy life) and seconly with these pathetic views you are not liberal. What is wrong with women getting political power in community proportionate to their numbers?

What is this with every educated upper class pakistani getting religious education/tutoring at the tendor age of 8 and 10. and then they grow up and boast they grew up in a very liebral environment.

Did you hint at mullah teaching you some sexual tricks in first few paragraphs?

This is one sorry read. Dude you are on a very slippery slope here. My son asked me the same question, and let me paraphrase it for you: “Daddy, why can only a man lead a prayer? Are Muslims worshiping God or a Penis?”. What should I tell him?

``is also endowed with good looks from both sides of the family.``

Not sure about the other side, but you are plain butt ugly, even by, lets say, madrasi standards...

Secondly Mr. Feminist, why do you have such a low opinion of your wife? Is she a doormat? Why can`t she decide what education to give to your child?

Remember, your wife is someone`s daughter. What does around comes around.... so treat her well if you want your daughter to be treated well when she grows up. K?

Re: # 6

Ali -

Correction: Chennai

Azmat, {``So in terms of being leaders women already have an important role; to shape the moral education of their offspring. I suspect that those women who are looking for a leadership role in the community are interested in political power. In other words they want to satisfy their egotistical desire for power within a community. True leaders of the community are always recognized by others for their work. If women want to take on such a role then like mother Theresa they ought to be prepared to work within the system.``}

Very touching article and congratulations on becoming a dad. Your daughter is a cutie and you are too for thinking about her future already. There are many women (and men) who can be role models for our daughters (and sons). Mother Theresa, of course, is among the best of role models. The important thing to remember is that we need to empower our children (male AND female) with education, confidence, good nature, and compassion. Your apprehension about feminists is justified. Good luck in all your noble intentions.

I apologize for the cruelty of some Chowkies here. :)

confusing article on a sensitive topic ...
... you`re going to get butchered

Writer,

I was struck by your attempts to delegitimize the various stances that women working within and outside of the ``Muslim`` world hold. I am struck that on one hand you are interested in fighting for your daughter to be as fully evolved as is possible and on the other hand, you are, by your very example, showing great disrespect for the women who are negotiating interpretations that are hostile to them. What is your daughter to understand? That her father knows best? And what have you taught her then?

regards,

#10, {``showing great disrespect for the women who are negotiating interpretations that are hostile to them. What is your daughter to understand? ``}

So, that`s what it`s called? ``Negotiating interpretations.`` What an insidious attempt at spinning nonsense! The main thing that is hostile to real women`s interests is feminazism that turns many men and most real women off. Mr. Azmat`s daughter will understand that her daddy really loved her so much that he sheltered her from a life of strife and ridicule by keeping her away from feminazis.

#5, Kulharee {``My son asked me the same question, and let me paraphrase it for you: “Daddy, why can only a man lead a prayer? Are Muslims worshiping God or a Penis?”. What should I tell him? ``}

Muslims are worshiping God. Women are always welcome to lead prayers. It`s only some old men with disappearing organs who insist that only men can lead prayers, or for that matter anythiing. And no, one does not need to grow a beard to prove leadership.

Re: # 11

Here we go again, the reheated former drag queen begging for attention....

FOR THE RECORD:

I will not be responding to any futher posts from mumbaichick and nyetsahb.

#13, How about negotiating your interpretation that femazism replace all the world`s major religiouns and that all men be placed in cages where feminazis can watch and laugh at the rapes as they issue visas and bags of money to the abused men?

Re: # 12

Chauhan Sahib, I don’t buy it. In theory women can hold all the most powerful positions (Nabi, Imam, Khalifa, etc.) but in reality that’s not the case. Why ain’t there any Muftis, any Moulanas, any Khalifees. Where are they? And what about Bigamy? If man can have upto 4 wives, why can’t a Muslim woman have at least half as many Hubbies? Why is life so sucky for Muslim women? If that’s not enough, she is constantly reminded not to worry, as Daddy will always be there to protect her.

Azmat,
This is a very important topic and I am glad that you have the courage to share your views, concerns, and hopes with us. I would try to teach my daughter:

That she is a very special person, who is the product of love, and a welcome source of hope for the future.
That she needs to be educated both in formal training and in seeing the world to understand it and improve it.
That she is destined to be a full partner in how this world operates and improves.
That she does not need to consider herself inferior or superior to other humans.
That the best way to accomplish success is through cooperation with ALL other human beings.
That honesty, compassion, generosity, and tolerance are just as important as success, pride, self-sufficiency, and loyalty.
That most men are well-wishers and will respect her on their own, without her having to hit them on the head or force them to ``admit`` their respect. What matters most is how she conducts herself and people will respond accordingly.