Prayers

Re: Ikbal Khan

Excellent poem.....I could relate to it completely.

It touched off chord in me, which was both personal and painful and brought back a lot memories, which are presently still glowing like some dying embers within my soul. There is an internal conflict within me and that poem was the perfect mirror to the angst that ocassionally overwhems me when I am off my guard.

Best Wishes!

this is my firt time ever replying to any article on chowk. however, i have been reading articles on it quite religiously sincejanuary 1999.

i admire your creative ability to be able to write poems in two different languages. myslef, i was never able to grasp the techniques of urdu poetry. that`s a pretty sad state of affairs what with me being a desi an` all. anyway keep it up! hope to see more of your poems.

re: post number 7

dhoban ko tou dekhnay mein bhi awoon geen..

Apologies:

# 10 belongs to another thread..

t

Hey solitutde:

When did they let you out? Remember to take your prescription drugs or they will come and get you.

hallucinatingly,

t

Fozia:

Aren`t you in Southern Ont? If you are there are several literary and religious organisations that may help you with your Urdu.

Oh, and thanks for liking the poem

Sameer:

What can I say? Nowhere you indicated anything about the poem. Perhaps you did not like it.

thanks any ways

ikbal

How odd. For some reason, my response did not go through, or just wasn`t posted.

In any case, quick recap from what i remember...

Love transcreation, my friend! I find it invigorating and always feel so amazed at our ability to not only speak different languages, but also master them enough to create in them. Due to my bias, I am more inclined to enjoy the Urdu versions... I feel they convey the sentiment so much more beautifully... although, I can`t locate the core inspiration on either side...which is brilliant - and makes it a whole - not two separate entities.

congrats -you have brought transcreation into the new millenniuum. (smile)

adaab arz hai.

I hope that the wishes of your friends are granted
too.
Let us hope for a lasting peace in South Asia.

Ras

JNTUCE99,

Yes there is a connection from a generation back -JANTU 88.

It IS a global village and right now with all these jokers shouting, it looks like we met in the wrong bar.

I`ll see you around.

Vikram

I really like seeing the poetry in both English and Urdu in Latinized script. It`s great in helping to improve my Urdu vocabulary! I hope more will do this in the future.

One other suggestion I would make to this format is to add a third column where the the poem is written in Urdu script as well. That would be of great help in improving the reading of Urdu too for those of us who had to teach ourselves.

Oh yes, and I think it`s a nice poem too!

Thanks,

Fozia

Har dua gar qabool ho jaye

Here are some of things which will happen in Indian sub-continent.

1. 90+ percent of all the newborns will be male and in 50-00 years there will be no more females left. The biggest export will be males and biggest import will be females.

2. God will send houris to east of Koh-e-Sulaiman and ghilmans to the west of it.

3. India can just walk in and take over Pakistan during Hajj season because all able bodied Pakistanis will be in Saudi Arabia in another two months.

3. Pakistan will have Kashmir resulting in a plunge in the saffron prices to the glee of paan-eaters....a tremendous boost to the economy!

4. All the departed loved ones will become alive and well. No use for war in the absense of death.

5. Pfizer stocks will plummet due the uselessness of Viagra because vitality and ageing will be the things of the past.

6. There will be Ram mandir and Babri mosque next to each other in Ayodhya, next to the largest land fill for all the garbage of sub-continent.

7. The hijackers will be killed in a ``road accident`` on their way to Raiwind.

8. It will require one short prayer to cure baldness, fatness and graying of hair.

9. Pervez Musharaf will make a peaceful exit.

10. Corruption will be inversely proportional to health, happiness and prosperity.

11. Jay`s prayers will not be accepted.

To be continued....by others!!!

Loved the poetry but please cut the Bagwhan bit out from the title, It`s Hindu for God`s sake. Next thing, your`re going to fit in Budha and rama. A|ll the best.

Brilliant -- good work.

Iqbal- I found this poem quite moving. And sincere too. Nice...

I really like the basic idea, it`s sufiesque to the letter. A capital attempt! I would, however, like to point out that you probably want to avoid a literal translation from Urdu to English. Poetical translations are bound to be interpretative - that`s not a bad thing at all.

The first stanza reads as:

``You eternal, me temporal

You here, there, everywhere

me? nowhere.``

I can see a word-to-word replacement in translation, except in english it doesn`t qualify as a sentence - a big whammy.

I`m just pointing this out because I`m sure your next work will be a true masterpiece - just my $0.02.

Regards and keep whirling wise dervish.

ikbal (#17)

I think ``I Love Mushraf`` would be much better...

May get chowk some free publicity through danda regime..

just a thought.. :)

chowkwala..

Adnan.